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1.
the king crab blumpkin is prefaced by eating an excessive amount of spicy japanese food so as to make your blumpkin shit as liquid and rancid as possible.

the kind crab blumpkin begins by picking the crabs out of your pubes while receiving blumpkin and strategically placing said crabs (pubic lice for you retards) throughout the hair of the female slobbing your knob. just as you're about to shoot your load, wait until the aforementioned whore is in a downward bob, slide sideways off the toilet and forcefully slam her face into the asian frying oil you've been brewing in the toilet. ejaculate on the shocked, fried dumpling whore.

joe: hey man, how was your date with cheryl?

mike: pretty good. she wanted to spend a quiet night alone so we watched 50 first dates and i took her out to a real nice sushi place. thought i'd add a little spice to the night so i king crab blumpkin'd her.
by me@tspin February 26, 2009