Draconian punishment for the fussy girfriend who keeps complaining about your unavoidabe flatulence, and who keeps escaping when you try to hold her head under the blanket.
A rich fart is released silently into your hand, you expell all air from your lungs then breath in the fart from your closed hand. You now make an amorous approach and breath the fart into her face / mouth as you kiss her. This will cure the problem as she WILL leave you. Failing this you repeat the procedure but first you bite strips of of your fingernails and wedge them between your teeth - an "indirect fart with nails"
I gave her an indirect fart