Heinz 57 is a shortened form of a historical advertising slogan "57 Varieties of Pickles" by the H. J. Heinz Company located in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, United States. It has come to mean anything that is made from a large number of parts or origins.
I love my dog, but he's a real Heinz 57.
by hiddengerbil March 13, 2018
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wherein the act of vaginal penetration creates a sound not unlike that of direct fist contact with a half-empty ketchup bottle directly on the 57. In uncouth circles, this is referred to as a queef.
"I don't want to fuck you too hard, you might Heinz 57".
by Heinz Catsup January 4, 2009
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The offspring of an inter-racial couple, a bashtard, and a disgrace
Dang yo..this little brat is a heinz 57..the brat and his mother is a disgrace to the white/chinese/black communities.
by Sherman February 9, 2005
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1. The scientific way to get ketchup out of an old style Heinz bottle

2. The preferred way to jerk-off or give a handy to an old man. Using Newton’s Law of Viscosity the handjob giver influences the fluid flow at a speed proportional to the force applied to it.

Both involve the following two-handed jig process:

Shake vigorously enough so that the solid particles unsettle. Next, turn upside down and thrust with both hands downwards at high speeds. This should help move the sauce into the neck, which is particularly important if your client is old and empty. Lastly, turn upright and karate-chop gently at the nape... careful as the sauce is guaranteed to flow!
Handjobs were preferred by Robert Kraft, and to no one's surprise, his Masseuse used the Heinz 57 Method which had his sauce gushing out in seconds.
by b_ats February 22, 2019
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Perception of the nature of an event after it has happened. Not to be confused with "hindsight", heinz sight is 57, not 2020.

(Coincidentally, Heinz has 57 varieties.)
"Damn dude, I shouldn't have jumped my snowmachine over the house."
"Well you know what they say, heinz sight is 57."
by BongRipper3000 April 28, 2017
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1. The scientific way to get ketchup out of an old style Heinz bottle

2. The preferred way to jerk-off or give a handy to an old man. Using Newton’s Law of Viscosity the handjob giver influences the fluid flow at a speed proportional to the force applied to it.

Both involve the following two-handed process:

Shake vigorously enough so that the solid particles unsettle. Next, turn upside down and thrust with both hands downwards at high speeds. This should help move the sauce into the neck, which is particularly important if your client is old and empty. Lastly, turn upright and karate-chop gently at the nape... careful as the sauce is guaranteed to flow!
Robert Kraft prefers handjobs and to no one's surprise, his Masseuse used the Heinz 57 Method, getting his sauce gushing out in seconds.
by b_ats February 22, 2019
Get the Heinz 57 Method mug.