A phrase used by www.somethingawful.com goon
s. It is derived from an old song regarding robots; the author of the song tried to gain fame equal to that of the All Your Base
phenomenon. It failed to gain much popularity, but SA goons use the phrase to this day to identify other goons.
A special response is required to correctly answer this question and let the questioner know that one is indeed an SA goon. The generally accepted answer is "I am protected." Be aware that if you use this reply without actually being an SA goon, you may open yourself up to a world of hurt.
<Goon> do you have stairs in your house
<Bob> I am protected.
<Goon> GOONY GOON GOON GOONS GOONERY
<Goon> So how about that FYAD thread about mechagirl
<Bob> Fia-what? Who girl?
<Goon> goddamnit you got the stairs response from urbandictionary didnt you
1. A nonsecret identifier between Something Awful forum goons. Canonical answer: "I am protected." In communal memory and appreciation of...
2. An Internet meme originating from Something Awful leader Richard Kyanka's famous "Space Robot Bonanza" ICQ prank, in which he successfully convinces a gullible person that he has created "space robots" from VCR parts to protect astronauts from "the terrible space secret". Unfortunately, the Pusher Robot (which shoves) and the Shover Robot (which pushes) have undertaken to protect the entire human race by pushing them down flights of stairs. Kyanka eventually switches to the persona of one of the robots and convinces the victim that the robots have "protected" Kyanka down the stairs. "The robot" then sends the victim into a panic by offering to protect him, asking for his location, and asking him "DO YOU HAVE STAIRS IN YOUR HOUSE". Similarly to AYBABTU, "DO YOU HAVE" was made into a song by The Laziest Men on Mars and then a Flash animation by Jonathan Robinson. However, in AYBABTU's case the song and animation are credited with kicking off the fad, while in "DO YOU HAVE"'s case they followed it.
"why are u guys all so mean"
"Do you have stairs in your house?"
A common catchphrase used by FYAD frequenters. It is asked of users with glaring intellect shortcomings and is another way of asking them to commit suicide by falling down a flight of stairs.
<L33tHAXOR2> LOL DO U HAEV STAIRS IN YOUR HOUSE?
<Bob> Oh, internet.
<L33tHAXOR2> LOL FYAD IS LEAKING