A term used to describe people who are enamored with British TV, movies, music, and culture but do not live in or are in any way part of Britain. Crumpeteers will consume any form of British media for the sole reason that it was made in Britain. Many Crumpeteers think that this "appreciation" of British culture makes their taste in such things superior, but this is not necessarily a defining trait of Crumpeteers.
Mark: Have you seen the new episode of Sherlock yet? I just watched it after listening to the latest Adele album and drinking tea!

Tyler: *Sigh* Such a crumpeteer.
by Alpaca_Man January 13, 2012
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A person who is'nt very smart. With a brain like a crumpet, full of holes.
I asked that bloke for a hammer and he gave me a screwdriver, 'What a crumpet!'
by Loopt March 2, 2017
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Slang for Vagina, Nothing To Do With The Actual Shape Or Structure Of 'It' But A Crude(r) Way Of Saying It. . .
'' Yo Man She Had One Tite Crumpet!''

(After Sex, Man Annouces)
''Maaan! Best Crumpet I Ever Had''
by jordita October 7, 2007
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little round bits of fyeness
Dude, hand me another crumpet. These are fye as heck and go great with tea!
by The One Guy September 27, 2007
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Crumpet is the "polite way" of saying the word Cunt. Usually not heard within civilized conversation.

Therefor the word crumpet is heavily used by middle and upper class society members, especially with the younger generations. The word crumpet can easily be heard in schools around the western suburbs of Sydney, were lads are prevalent and the word cunt is used by those dirty lads.
1) lad: oi cunt come 'ere!
Alex to friend: that lad is such a crumpet
2) alex to keiran: Lauren likes her crumpet dripping with honey

keiran to alex: that's why I'm a bee keeper!
by Therealman445 June 25, 2010
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