Top Definition
IRS-sponsored, trademarked, copyrighted pseudo-religious corporation that claims you are an immortal spiritual being with infinite capabilities as long as you can prove this to the church with your money in order to receive a church certification that claims you are a spiritual being with infinite capabilities.
Otherwise, you are either a 'downstat' (inferior) or worse: a 'suppressive person' (enemy). In this case you can be ruined, sued, tricked, lied to or destroyed utterly - per church policy.
As anyone can see from the above, the church of $cientology is really a bona fide religion.
by Anastasius August 09, 2005
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