| 1. | jewnog | ||
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n. the Jewish equivalent of the Christmas drink: eggnog. rich in flavor and texture, but kosher. often with a subtle creamy aftertaste Bob didn't celebrate Christmas, but he got some jewnog for Chanukkah.
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| 2. | Dreidel Daddy | ||
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A man of the jewish religion that happens to enjoy the taste of milk chocolate, white chocolate, dark chocolate, (not talking about the candy) and the intimate company of women in general. Damn, that guy is always gettin the yak buttah, gettin papa smurfed by his boppas. What a dreidel daddy.
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| 3. | Chrisonica | ||
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Combination of Christmas and Hanukkah
(phonetic onica for Hanukkah) Signifies combined celebration of the two Holidays Christmas and Hanukkah by mixed religon familes (couples) in stories by Susan Miller (Parkinsons writer, poet, author) "In a secret meeting beween Harry and Santa:
(Harry Hanukkah to Santa Claus) Why doesn't Hanukkah get top billing? WHY does it have to be CHRISonica? Instead it should be "HonicaMas"? Hanukkah comes first almost every year and lasts longer! (Santa replies to Hanukkah Harry) Harry be reasonable the reason is simply Chrisonica is more Phonica . By having Chrisonica we make more Monyca$ makeing it a longer Holidonica. Hanukkah Harry seeing the immense logic in Santa's words had to agree. The New Holiday should be called ChrisOnica for the love of Monyca$. "Merry Chrisonica to one and a Happy New Chrysonica to all" (Susan Miller c 1986) |
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| 4. | Printer Hanukah | ||
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When your printer cartridge lasts an unexpectedly long time after the computer has notified you that it needs to be changed. My report was 17 pages, even though the ink was low, I was able to get the whole thing...Happy printer hanukah!
Man, that thing has lasted like two weeks! This is the longet printer hanukah I've ever seen. The store was closed, and the paper was due the next morning. If it wasn't from an unexpected printer hanukah I'd have failed the class. |
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| 5. | hanukkah | ||
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The way too long and somewhat boring winter holiday that really isn't anything other than a weak attempt to apply the least amount of tincture to our children's wounds for not being allowed a Santa Claus at that fercocktenah time of year, comprising the period of the most intense fear mongering and when really close minded and insecure xenophobics worry a kid might for just one day, December 25, rather just be another American kid and get a Master Replica light saber and some weird red and white striped candy from a fat old white guy dressed in red who jets around the world in a reindeer driven sielgh. Oy vey!
"Ok, so what's that about the lump of coal I got for Hanukkah last year?" or "Isn't it enough you cut part of my special friend off?" or "So instead of Toys and elves and magic, all I get to celebrate Hanukkah by having to eat greesy latkes and light candles every single night (8) nights in a row?" or And all this just so my parents can quietly think; "Hey, Busta, aren't we doing a good job making Seth feel better about Santa not visiting with those really pretty Hanukkah cookies and greesy latkes and that really cool story about the Greeks and how Jews found oil to light their candles for a week and a day?" or "I am going to marry that cute gentile Mom and Dad so I can have an excuse to celebrate the other really cool celebration. Hey, admit it, for us kids anyway, Hanukkah can't light a candle to Santa's Toy Time."
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| 6. | Christmahanakwanzaka | ||
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An amalgamation of the major winter holidays (Christmas, Hanukkah, and Kwanzaa) into one big non-denominational bastard holiday. Usually used in greeting form when the recipient's beliefs are unknown. Hey Bob, Happy Christmahanakwanzaka!
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| 7. | Hanukwanzmas | ||
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Combining Christmas, Hanukkah, and Kwanza into a single term. These are the three holidays typically mentioned around this time so it's easier to say them all at once and not be some PC douchebag and say "Happy Holidays". Have a happy Hanukwanzmas
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