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1.
When the girl you've been interested in chooses the most inopportune moment to inform you she has a boyfriend. Often followed by you punching a baby.
Guy: hey man, do you have any extra babies kicking around I can punch?

Guy's wicked awesome female friend: I'll make you a fresh one, under one condition: it has to be a fatal blow. We don't want it surviving said punch. Brb. Got 9 months of work ahead of me.

Guy: If you'd rather not work the full 9 months, I'd be happy to meet you at the top of a flight of stairs.

Guy's wicked awesome female friend: :) you're the best! BTW, what has caused this baby punching tangent?

Guy: Well, I met this super cute girl the other day, and I was just about to tell her I was warm for her form when she dropped the boyfriend bombshell!

Guy's wicked awesome female friend: Harsh, dude! *hands dude a fresh baby*
by Dave-Landon March 30, 2012