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ASSWHAFFLE 

Is a person that will lean on your dock box with a cold beer and tell you what you're doing wrong on that smokey diesel as you swear, kick and sweat. They'll come to your rescue with a cold beer, a willing hand, tools and shared lessons learned the hard way. Much like a kid, you won't listen and someday after you've "matured" in this new life of wind and sails, you might be the Asswhaffle passing along your knowledge to the new guy.
Or it might be that arm chair sailor that really did know his shit back in the the day, who for reasons unknown can't be on the water that he loves anymore, but he longs to share his glorious stories; listen to his stories with your BS filter turned on high: you might learn, laugh, walk away shaking your head in disbelief or you might just be getting a glimpse into your future
An Asswhaffle will loan you their cleanest dirty shirt for a job interview at the bike rental shop so you can live your dream on your boat.
An Asswhaffle will, in light jest (unless you jeopardize the safety of passengers, crew & those around you), point out the errors of your ways so that you become a safer Asswhaffler for the safety of Asswhafflers on all of Mother Earth's waterways.
An Asswhaffle is someone that's a little funky, eccentric, marches to the beat of their own drum, makes their own rules, helps others when (s)he can, never wastes what (s)he takes from Mother Earth & always pays it forward.
(c) Kristine E Gentry 2015
I went over to the tiki bar looking for an Asswhaffle to help me scrape paint off of the hull of my boat.
ASSWHAFFLE by KEGGERS February 28, 2015
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Variation of Asshole. Origin: A Wad of Recently used Toilet Paper.
"You're such an Asswad Jerry!"
Asswad by Hazard October 23, 2003
a complete jerk
someone who shoots mouth off when not asked.
a bulge in the rear of your jeans
Look at Jack,he's a complete asswad.
asswad by Mr Lee December 23, 2006
an asswhat is an asswhat.
guy one: Alyssa is an asswhat
asswhat by ya boi 96 August 11, 2019
Function: Noun, A mass of semen, and perhaps feces, that has been or will be discharged from the anus of a person after anal sex. "
The hooker left an asswad on my nightstand.
Tim is an asswad.
asswad by blowhole138 December 3, 2007

Douchey Asswad 

A asswad of a human being who unexplainably resembles a douche
That asswad over there looks like a complete douche. A douchey asswad...
Douchey Asswad by bigggslim March 16, 2011

asswaddle 

An asswaddle is a penguin with a large juicy cock up its ass.
"Look at that asswaddle over there. It has a dick in it's anus!"