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1.
A volcano that spews hearts. A Valentine Volcano is most often seen at a senior center when two older people are very much in love, such as is seen with Beatrice Middleton and her boyfriend, Hec Hanley. A Valentine Volcano is very hard to stop; when it erupts, look out! Your heart will be on fire.
Beatrice: Wow! There's a Valentine Volcano out here. (she kisses Hec)

Hec: Whoah! Good one! Super-charged. You know there must be tons of Valentine Volcanoes around here.

Beatrice: Look where we are. We're at the Senior Center. There's some sweet stuff going on here.

Elsie: This is gonna be a great date! Would you dance with me?

Hec: (switches on 'Love Me Tender') This is a real volcano. Careful now, we're gonna get burned!

Beatrice: Its not that type of volcano. Would you be my Valentine, sweetie? (she sits down and starts rubbing Hec with some Martian Mud)

Hec: Of course I'll be your Valentine. You know I love you. We're both former Marines here. Semper Fi!

Beatrice: Yes, we almost live by the same creed. Honor, courage, commitment - A Gunny Granny's gotta do what a Gunny Granny's gotta do! Valentine Volcanoes are hot!
by Dusty's Baby Powder September 03, 2011
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