Top Definition
1.Zach Laffin
-repeatedly saying you are going to bed, only to return and drink half a beer more
-calling someone "Hey you, with the feet"
-Spilling Mt. Dew and calling it 'your beerz'

2. Wooden Hammer
-shirts come off
-Everyone is your friend

3.Hammered
-Self explanatory

4.ShitFaced
-Belligerently drunk

5.Iron Horse
-Fuckin' gone
-If anyone can function Iron Horsed they deserve a crown
Tiers of drunkenness

1. Andrew:"I was Zach Laffining last night and I was tickling this chick's toes."
Emily: "Man I know, but dude, you were just tipsy."

2. Zach:"I had four beers and was still a wooden hammer. Bummer dude."

3. Andrew:"I am intoxicated"
Zach: "Shut up buddy."

4. Zach: I was shitfaced and tried to go through the doggie door while chasing the cat."

5. Emily:"I was working my way to iron horse status, but passed out between wooden hammer and hammered."
Andrew: "Lightweight."

by Rockisland April 18, 2009
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