Slurry Muff, adj. The vaguely erotic act of filling a girl's muff up to the brim with fresh farm slurry while she sleeps. Can, and has, been used for many years as a humourous party trick on both land and sea, as well as Bar Mitzvahs, cocktail parties, coronations and the international textile market.
Especially popular in parts of Glasgow, where it has acquired something of a cult status for some obscure reason.
It is also regularly referred to in the light hearted ending of the BBC news at 10. Incidentally, this is also where Natasha Kaplinsky's massive head can usually be seen.
Lame guy: "Hey guys, Meredith is asleep. Lets draw on her with a marker pen and stuff!"
Doug: "No you wanker, lets slurry muff that bitch!"
Can also adapted for use in popular nursery rhymes for all age groups, i.e:
Mary's sleeping, Mary's sleeping,
Fetch the slurry, Fetch the slurry,
Pump it in there, Pump it in there,
Lick the remnants, Lick the remnants