1. Curriculum: it is by the enforcement of curriculum that we can positively ensure your mental intake of information is kept in a rigid line. You will have no time to experience other things; even if you did you would feel guilty. “What a waist of space in my mind” You’d think.
2. Exams: It is by the continuous use of exams that we can ensure your self-esteem remains at an all-time low. Lower grades means lower respect. You will be called an idiot; you will have low chances in life. The alternative is to succumb to the weight of society, allow us to control your mind. It is easier this way. We promise.
3. Ritualistic mornings: This is the fun part! You now will have to awaken at early hours. Yes any chance of true restfulness is completely imposable. Do you ever walk into school and feel, for a split second, as though you are unconscious? That is how we want you to feel all the time. That is the point in early mornings.
4. Social humiliation: Yes, we didn’t plan this out. So don’t think we’ll take credit for it, yes this part is all thanks to you. It not only away chips away your self-esteem it also encourages hatred, which you will feel toward foreign nations later in life. We guarantee it.
5. Repetitiveness: It is by the continuous repetitiveness of your scholarly years that we can encourage a clockwork feeling within you.
6. Useless information: By presenting you with this information we can disallow independent thought. While you may begin to think for yourself your teacher, asking you to pay attention, will continually interrupt you. This is one of my favourites!
7. Obedience: Yes this is firmly set into the school world. Discipline, self-discipline, thought-discipline hell it’s all here! We take great pride in our ability to control you. Our shrill voices echoing down the corridor. Yes you needn’t ever feel safe, in or out of school. Be afraid, be very afraid.
8. Long term: This will last sometime; you probably won’t be able to remember a time you weren’t in school. No mode of comparison, excellent.
9. Holidays: We have carefully timed these so that they are long enough to maintain sanity but short enough to deter independent thought.
10. Work ethic: You cannot be a worker without work ethic.
We hope you enjoy your stay. Don’t try to escape, even if the gate is always open.
6:02 a.m.=After dozing off again for two minutes, my mother comes into my room and screams at me to get up. Not wanting to argue at this time, I sluggishly arise from my warm bed, into the cold bathroom where I take a two minute shower. I get soap in my eyes and forget to shampoo my hair. Oh well, I don't have time anyway. I dress quickly and brush my teeth, not having any time to eat.
7:30 a.m.=I sit in first period class, after getting off the bus, where I spent the last 15 minutes with a pack of screaming children, and try to "rest" in my hard seat and desk. I get yelled at by my teacher, whom hasn't brushed her teeth in a month, and get 2 days of after-school detention.
I wipe my sleepy eyes and try to focus on my algebra book, which has crude drawings in it. I speak to my teacher about this, whom just screams at me again for not having permission to speak. Two more nights detention.
12:30 p.m=I sit alone in the cafeteria, where all the seats are taken by the "popular" people, who are too busy texting and listening to their mp3 players to acknowledge my existence. I sit at a table in the corner, where 3-day-old fries cause a horrible smell, and cause me to lose my appetite. Oh well, I have no lunch money anyway. The janitor leans against the wall and eyes me carefully. His nose hairs are so long, I feel a strange urge to braid them. I lay my head down on the table, and a cafeteria worker yells at me to wake up.
3:00 p.m.=I arrive home from school, lugging almost all the contents of my locker in my backpack. I sit down and do and hour and a half of my homework, before going to softball practice.
8:30 p.m.=Covered in dirt from practice, I only have time to eat a Hot Pocket and continue the rest of my homework.
11:00 p.m.=With an unfinished project still due, I collapse on my bed, knowing the next day I will obtain further punishment for my unfinished assignment. I groan and crawl under the covers. Thoughts of problems at school cause me to not sleep, and before I know it the alarm clock sounds off and the cycle repeats.
To be blunt = SCHOOL SUCKS!
Student: (quiet muttering)
Teacher: I HEARD THAT! AN HOURS DETENTION!
Teacher: Why didn't you do your homework?
Honest student: I had other homework to do and also i needed some time to chill out. You only gave us a day to do it.
Teacher: I GAVE YOU MORE THAN ENOUGH TIME! YOU WILL FINISH IT AND MORE AFTER SCHOOL!!
Jeff at 33 works as a math teacher and has recived 10 best teacher awards. He makes a heafty ammount of money yearly and has a nice house and 2 kids.