Raymond's Mustache is a God tier entity which has assimilated with Raymond's upper lip. This mustache is in fact sentient and has partial control over Raymond's actions, thoughts, and decisions. The mustache has existed long before Raymond has been alive, however, Raymond is the mustache's favorite host thus far. This mustache's biological trail can be traced back to the early 18th century, its first host was Black Beard.

The Biology

The mustache is impervious to fire, cold temperatures, acid, hair remover, and most other dangers present to a mustache. While there is no recorded evidence of the mustache being shaved or damaged by a razor, it is able to be trimmed by the host. While there is no danger to the host from assimilation, if he host decides to attempt to remove or shave the mustache the hair follicles with pierce the brain stem, killing the host. After the hosts death the mustache has approximately 48 hours to find a new host and begin the new assimilation.

The mustache connects to the host's brain by burrowing its fair follicles through the upper lip and through the skull to attach to the brain stem. The pheromones released by the hair endings control the release and reception of different chemicals in the brain, this usually ends up in the host becoming syndical and 'grumpy'. Raymond is no different, the composition of his brain is forever changed so that the mustache will stay in one place rich in nutrients and where the climate perfectly supports its growth.
Man, that thing is stronger than Raymond's Mustache
by Lusamyne February 13, 2021
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