Waking up in the morning laid next to her, an overwhelming feeling of utter dispair washes over me, just like the STD's washing over my cock. I immediately leap from the bed and make my escape while sleeping beauty rests.
Arriving home i head straight for the bathroom, where i locate the pumice rock. My only logical option is to get busy with the pumice rock on my freshly diseased member.
Friend: "Dude, how many times did you fuck her last night?"
Me: "Seriously! Enough times to warrant a PUMICE COCK!!!!"