A society for the intellectually pretentious. Not all Mensa members are pretentious egomaniacs, but... ok, yes we are. But, some of us aren't snobs.

Some people makes jokes about paying money to have an IQ test administered and then paying more money in annual dues just for the right to be in such an organization. I make those same jokes and I'm a member (It does make for good resume fluff and I will confirm that it has helped when my potential employers knew of the organization). The conversations are agonizing and the Mensa Bulletin (monthly magazine) runs a high probability of making your eyes bleed.

The best part about being a Mensa member is knowing someone with about 130 IQ and calling them "normie" (cute term for those with normal intelligence. Get it?! Ha...) and talking down to them.

Entrance to the organization requires a professionally administered IQ test with a result showing the taker to be in the top 2% of the population. For those without any previous qualifying tests, Mensa administers two tests ($30, which really isn't terribly bad for a professioanlly administered and graded test). A 98th percentile passing grade is only needed on one of the two tests. Scoring 99th percentile doesn't earn any kind of cool decoder ring, though, much to my dismay.

Mensa members are frequently found with useless degrees like an Ed.D. They do this to be called "doctor." It's easier to get an Ed.D. than it is to get a real doctorate, but it requires less "useful" knowledge, and no one will have to know!
Mensa is Latin for table. A three legged table doesn't wobble. An M has three "legs." See the connection? Eh? Neither do I. Round table society... "open-minded" discussions... yada yada yada.

The Simpsons episode about Mensa was flawed only by their letting Lisa in. Lisa is 7 years old and, therefore, too young to be a member. Mensa also doesn't just hand out free memberships! You'll get your free Mensa membership around the same time the Scientologists stop charging for whatever it is that they do.

"A guy walked into a bar with a lizard sitting on his shoulder. He said to the bartender, "A double whiskey for me and," pointing to the lizard, "a half-pint of Guiness for Tiny here."
"Why do you call him Tiny?" asked the bartender.
"Obviously," the man answered, "because he's my newt."
If you don't understand the joke, you have failed the admission test in advance. Please send me the $30 via Paypal and try again later.
by IamWD May 18, 2006
Top Definition
Interestingly, the Spanish use of the word mensa (female) or menso (male)generally denotes someone who is crazy or stupid.
"No seas menso".... Don't be crazy. Or, "mensa, yo te dije que no lo hicieras"... stupid, I told you not to do it.
by Guerito August 03, 2005
A group of people with high IQs. Ironically these people also pay quite a bit of money to be in this group. There by paying to be told they are intelligent. Which ironically is well...not the least intelligent.
I passed the Mensa Test! To bad I am to intelligent to blow my money on being told what I already know.
by Ravenwolf B. February 27, 2006
A global scam which administers a test (charging in the range of 18$ to 30$) to see if you "qualify". It then proceeds to charge you a 52$ a year subscription charge. Multiply that times 50,000 members in America alone, I think you get the idea.
Whatever you do, don't let mensa trick you into taking their test.
by Waluut March 23, 2006
Sheesh Ninja Disaster, you have to do some research before blasting Mensa members like that.

True: Mensa is an organization for people with high IQs. Their requirement for entry is that their potential members must score within the top 2% in their standardized intelligence test.

False: Unlike some people would have you believe not all Mensa members are snobbish assholes. Also, their meetings are not just about academic endeavors . Many of them know that being extremely intelligent can be socially awkward so their meetings are a chance for these members meet other socially awkard intelligent people and do normal everyday things that regular "Schmoes" like you and I would do.
Famous Mensa members:

-Asia Carrera (famous pornstar)

-Geena Davis (famous actress)

-Jodie Foster (do I need to explain?)

by RC April 20, 2005
The Gentlemen's room in a Greek Restaurant
I gotta hit the Mensa, I'm prairie doggin'
by REK2 August 04, 2008
A group for douchebags who really, REALLY feel the need to pay a yearly fee to know that they're better than everyone else. Mensa members blame the "general public" who can't get accepted for accusations of their organization being riddled with douchebaggery and stupidity, but seem to forget that they are just under 0.018% of the American population, and the 2% of the population that CAN join hasn't for a reason.

On their "Join" page, there's a cute video of Leif Gantvoort telling you how easy it is to get into Mensa. He smiles, saying, "I will get into an argument with my wife and she'll call me an idiot -- that's when I whip out my Mensa card," proving to the world that he is a shaggy haired-walking pair of dick and balls. He brings another fellow ball of 19 year old afterbirth on the screen, who says that all members teach. This seems promising until dick and balls drops a load on the it, saying sarcastically, "I'm pretty sure it's a coincidence her last name is 'Wise.'"

An Asian cuckold appears on the screen, the "Mr. Mensa" of 2010. This creampie-eating dick and balls licker is so gracious that amazing people like Peter Bainbridge, a prominent Mensa member who is most often remember for referring to people with IQs of 60 as "carrots" (effectively insulting every disabled individual or individual with an actual moral code), his friend. You should be glad that you'll get some friends, because I promise you that when you join Mensa, you'll need them.
"While I qualify to join Mensa, I don't feel the need to pay an outrageous official Mensa test and yearly fee. I'd rather save my money, invest it, or spend it on something related to my field of interest rather than talk to a room full of pseudo-experts for an hour every week."

"Mensa has over 200 Special Interest Groups, from biology to psychology!" "That's incredible! I've heard that the Internet has over 7.5 billion groups tailored to your interests, from molecular biology in a cabin made from spruce logs to the psychology of snuff films when shown to kittens. Plus, you get the same experience of being ruthlessly lied to about accomplishments!"

"I'm sorry, you're denying me access to this VIP event? Maybe you haven't seen my... ...MENSA CARD?!" "My apologies, sir. I recognize that you are an extremely important individual because you have paid to be in a club that advertises as being 'easier than ever' to enter. Here, take this cat o' nine tail whip to lash me forty times as I kick out Bill Gates from his luxury box and fetch you some champagne. After all, you are one of the most elite forms of humans- a member of Mensa."

"God-doesn't-exist, I have been declared the chosen one! Mensa has selected me for their top-secret exclusive organization! This is a once in a lifetime chance! Now all I have to do is wait for my check to clear." ~Every Mensa Member Ever

"Wow, Bob, you joined Mensa? Funny, I thought you'd be smart enough to know that money can't buy you friends."
by oddmask October 01, 2013
A society for people with high IQs, which they define as being within the top 2% of the "general population." It is a haven for snobbish elitists who feel that it is their God-given right to belittle people who aren't as "smart" as they are (see: mensa troll, asshole, and superiority complex). In fact, the average Mensa gathering is just an exclusionist circle jerk where people talk about how goddamn smart they are and how stupid everyone else is, usually with a glass of brandy in one hand and a copy of Aristotle in the other (monocle and pretentious goatee optional). Beware when encountering a Mensa member on the street; if he does not eye you with contempt and shove past you in a huff, he will shove his status as a member down your throat in a long-winded self-aggrandizing monologue.
Me: Hey man, do you have the time?
Mensa Troll: Why, yes I do. But I'm not going to give it to you until you apologize for addressing me in such a crude manner.
Me: Uh... what?
Mensa Troll: Begone, you filthy pissant. My genius cannot be stifled by the suffocating weight of your ignorance.
Me: Ugh. You must be from Mensa...
Mensa Troll: Wow, how did you know?
Me: I dunno, just a feeling...
by Ninja Disaster December 14, 2004
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