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1.
The Matress is a system. And that system is designed for 2 things.
That system is there to keep us comfortable at night when we sleep, but is also designed to keep us awake, to think about how many more pillows you need.
Were you listening, neo, or were you looking at that pillow in red?
I slept on The Matress last night.
by anonymous October 12, 2003
56 44
 
2.
a dildo
i don't know why women and gays love matresses so much they aren't like real ones.
by InsaneClownJuggalo June 16, 2010
4 5
 
3.
Something my brother soils each and every night.
Ahh.
by B-Drac November 06, 2003
55 58