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1.
This is a delicate process, and no steps should be skipped.

1. Eat a Burrito
2. Take a shit in your underpants
3. Turn them inside out and allow the larger chunks to fall off, leaving smaller residue.

4. Place them in the freezer over night
5. Invite a girl over
6. When making out, place the frozen underwear over your hand like an oven mit, and gently massage her vagaina, just like you are sanding a peice of wood with sandpaper.
John- Hey Bill, how was your first match.com date last night?
Bill- It went well, until I did the lebanese sandpaper.

John- really, my sister told me she loves when guys do that
Bill- Weird....
by I shit in urinals June 10, 2010