Top Definition
To Kalman is to manipulate language in both an unusual but effective way.
Last night i asked Dave who that old king of England was and he totally kalmaned when he said "oh right it was i don't give a fuck"
by Christopher Trout May 12, 2011
An asshole who can't do shit. Always blames stuff on other people and lies a lot. Can't do anything for himself. Russian.
He's a kalman
by MeowFace322 March 19, 2015
a slacker or someone who never turns in their work and makes sad ass excuses to why they didn't do it.
Student: I didn't do my homework.
Teacher: You are such a kalman.
Student: i lIkE ChIcKeN.
by Fakey December 10, 2004
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