(ahy-vuhn; Russ. ee-vahn) (kel-ee),
1982 - Present, Landscape Architect, American Icon, and fashion trend setter; U.S. citizen; most notably credited with the invention of the popped-collar which to date has been responsible for nearly 7% of the entire GDP of the United States between the years of 2001 - 2005. Despite the undisputed economic gains which resulted from the initial jolt in sales of Polo shirts, respected economists both home and abroad are now tributing the economic collapse of 2008 to I.J. Kelley based on fundamental evidence indicating many homeowners began defaulting on their mortgages in order to divert personal income toward excessive numbers of "pop-able" collared shirts; Academy award for role in Waterworld 1993.
1982 - Present, Landscape Architect, American Icon, and fashion trend setter; U.S. citizen; most notably credited with the invention of the popped-collar which to date has been responsible for nearly 7% of the entire GDP of the United States between the years of 2001 - 2005. Despite the undisputed economic gains which resulted from the initial jolt in sales of Polo shirts, respected economists both home and abroad are now tributing the economic collapse of 2008 to I.J. Kelley based on fundamental evidence indicating many homeowners began defaulting on their mortgages in order to divert personal income toward excessive numbers of "pop-able" collared shirts; Academy award for role in Waterworld 1993.
Oh man am I glad I followed in the footsteps of I. J. Kelley and started popping my collar, otherwise my neck would be getting uber sunburned right now!
by J. Fehr. November 11, 2010