50
When you pray REAL hard, this is the person that ignores you.
Timmy: Please, God, Don't let me die of Cancer, I love my daddy and I love living.

2 Days Later

RIP Timmy
by BobDee January 27, 2008
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51
1) an all knowing, all loving being who once killed everyone in the world (other than one small family) because they were not doing what he wanted, yet allowed Hitler to mercilessly slaughter 6million Jews without consequence

2) an all knowing, all loving being who was once rather pissed off that two people ate a fruit they were not meant to; a crime which the entire human race is still paying the price for

3) an all knowing, all loving being who allows various wars and acts of terrorism to be carried out in his name, whereas a simple 'hello' from the man himself would resolve the whole thing instantly

4) an all knowing, all loving being who hands over the responsibility for punishing the difficult and troublesome humans to Satan

All in all, God either doesn't exist or he is a complete sadistic prick
Want an example, look at any natural disaster (Tsunami, earthquakes, etc). Why would an all knowing, all loving God do that?
by St. Satan October 24, 2007
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52
(noun) An imaginary friend for grown ups; commonly touted as being a supreme being responsible for the creation and continued maintenance of the universe. The identity and characteristics ascribed to God vary according to established doctrine and religious alignment. Most religious groups, however, agree that God hates gay people and frowns on the consumption of products containing pork. In a bizarre twist of fate God demands the faith of followers without the burden of evidence - however, this demand could not have been put forward without direct evidence that God exists (i.e. God must exist in order to issue commands to his followers).
Don't spank that monkey Billy, God is watching.
by superm0nkey May 06, 2007
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53
What more people misunderstand than understand, fight over than not, strive for than not, create division than unite.
matt: but i read that god is this way and you are wrong
sharon: and god is this way and everyone else is wrong

wiseman: neither of you understands both books
by ffddeerrrg August 26, 2009
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54
Well known, but often refuted. Appears in the Bible.
by Eddy June 30, 2003
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55
A mean old tyrant who threatens to punish anyone who disobeys him.
God: Do what I say or you will burn in a fire pit after you die.

Religious person: Yes master. You're not a bastard at all.
by Bloodbath 87 March 06, 2009
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56
God depends on your view of things. It could be the almighty all-in-one awesome dude. It could be 1000's of different people for every little thing. It could just be the Flying Spaghetti Monster in the sky (which I personaly belive in). Or (if your athiest) it could be nothing, your god could be money, Pokemanz, Urban Dictionary, ect.
1. Look! It's god coming down from heaven!

2. My village mainly worships the sun god, Apollo, who do you worship?

3. HOLY **** IT'S THE FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER! *bows*

4. *Hugs money* Your all I'll ever need besides my anal vibrator...
by TehFlyingSpaghettiMonstz0rOLOL February 11, 2010
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