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1.
1: A reporter on sky sports with a tendency to constantly remind others of their failures and mistakes, eventually, crushing their dreams. Examples of his work can be seen in an interview with Chelsea FC defender Branislav Ivanovic, and also in an interview with Arsenal defender, Carl Jenkinson.

2: An individual with the capability to make even the worst mishaps and accidents sound like minuscule issues through his cheerful manner of speech. Made famous by EA sports' FIFA 13. Can also be referred to as "The doctor on the touch line".
Geoff: Nice to hear that you passed your English literature exam with flying colors. But did you fail your physics quiz yesterday?
Me: I think so
Geoff: That means you will never be able to find success in the future.
Me: What?
Geoff: Unfortunately, you will forever be selling fish and chips at the chippy around the corner when you're thrown out by your parents in the future.

Ashley: Kyle! What happened to Johnathan? Will he be alright for our hiking trip tomorrow?
Kyle: I'm not sure. Let's turn to the doctor on the touch line, Geoff Shreeves
Geoff: He was in a nasty car accident. He suffered third degree burns and has most likely lost the ability to use his limbs forever. But he's a tough cookie, I think he'll carry on.
Ashley: Thanks Geoff!
by DomLompenFamous October 04, 2013