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9.
An "offer" introduced in the preceding months by those fools at Subway, a US submarine sanswich franchise.To be quite honest, this is one of the most insipid names for a deal that any marketing department has ever created. I'm sorry, but what the fucking hell is this shit? A five-dollar footlong? Are you motherfucking kiding me? Any fifth-grader can realize that "five-dollar footlong" sounds like an offer to take a pecker for five dollars. What the hell is this shit? A five-dollar footlong? Are you going to ask me if I want some mayonaise on that shit? Old bitch-ass motherfuckers. This is just destined to create misunderstanding, as follows:
Anonymous Agent #1: Hey man, I'm hungry as a motherfucker. You wanna get something to eat?
Anonymous Agent #2: You could go to Subway and get a five-dollar footlong.
Anonymous Agent #1: What are you saying about me, son? You saying I like dick?
Anonymous Agent #2: (Confused) What? Nah, man, I'm just saying that Subway has a 12" sandwich for only $5.
Anonymous Agent #1: Fuck you, man. I don't take no shit. (pulls a nine)
Anonymous Agent #2: What the fuck, man?! Why you pullin' the gat?
Anonymous Agent #1: And this is for that "double-whopper" jive you were pulling of me last week, you punk bitch. (Shoots Anonymous Agent #2)
Anonymous Agent #2: (Crying) What the fuck, man? I was just trying to help, son...
Anonymous Agent #1: That's right, cry like the little bitch that you are...
Anonymous Agent #2: WHY SUBWAY?! WHY...?!

Conclusion: Subway ruins lives.

Thank you for your time.
by MuigiKalash January 29, 2009
21 27
 
1.
subway's limited offer of a five dollar footlong!
im going to subway to get a five dollar footlong
by Josh Simpson of Illinois April 17, 2008
46 7
 
2.
A cheap and delicious sub from Subway. Jared eats it and so should you.
Five...
Five dollar...
Five dollar foot long!
by Gamer_2k4 January 21, 2009
42 9
 
3.
when you go into a subway take a shit dont flush and leave
person1: dude wanna go to subway

person2: no man lets just chill at my place

person1: well i gatta do a five dollar foot long but you moms in the shower
by dr.fuzz March 29, 2010
11 1
 
4.
the kind of deals man whores make
You: I got a five dollar footlong last night
Me: *gasp* you naughty girl/ boy
by RACHELLLLLLLLLL July 12, 2008
14 6
 
5.
The new deal on sandwiches at Subway, or a really bad pornographic movie.
I bought a 12" sub for 5 dollars, and ate it while I masturbated to "Five Dollar Foot Long."
by Eck XC 69 September 17, 2008
15 9
 
6.
Slang for the dump you have to take after eating at Subway.
Jareds in the bathroom, we ate at subway and he as to deposit a five-dollar footlong
by Froggler August 02, 2010
8 5
 
7.
1) Subway's deal, getting a footlong sandwich for $5
2) Its in my pants. Nuff Said.
LAUREN CONRAD: OMG this Five Dollar Footlong is so delicious and juicy
AUDRINA PARTRIGE: And big enough for us to share!
by Five $Dollar$ Footlong February 28, 2009
10 7