The idea that God created everything and we were never apes clonking each other with clubs and fossils are the result of the deadly "flood" known from the story of "Noah's Ark".
It's basically all B.S.
It's basically all B.S.
Pastor: "God created everything, face it, he is the most powerful creature on Earth. Creationism is fact."
Scientist: "Have you proof of such happenings? Have you found God?"
Pastor: "The Bible is enough proof."
Scientist: "Anyone can write facts down and have people believe in them. Just look at how Santa came to be."
Pastor: "You have a point. I have wasted countless years believing the ridiculous. I see the light now."
Scientist: "Have you proof of such happenings? Have you found God?"
Pastor: "The Bible is enough proof."
Scientist: "Anyone can write facts down and have people believe in them. Just look at how Santa came to be."
Pastor: "You have a point. I have wasted countless years believing the ridiculous. I see the light now."
by Science FTW August 9, 2006
A synonym for 'bullshit'.
by Corkeyno666 May 23, 2017
This is a belief which was invented to explain why we are all here. Basically it states that the world was created by some greater being (God). But then who created God? The theory of Creationsim falls flat through stating the Earth is thousands of years old, despite the fact it was proved to be billions of years old through scientific research. Creationists mock the theory of evolution and condemn the teaching of evolution at school. Evolution seems like the most sensible theory to me. Ah, but then howcome there are so many gaps in the evolutionary pathway? For one thing, it is a real fluke that an animal survives in fossil form, a billion-to-one chance requiring exactly the right geological conditions. Yes, we have a lot of skeletons in museums, but they are nothing when you consider how many animals have existed over the history of time. For another thing, it has been suggested that evolution takes place in jumps rather than gradually (a new, more evolved species suddenly starts appearing, gradualy takes over the older species). As for the teaching of evolution at school, it is taught as a theory. You don't have to believe in it. On the other hand, teaching Creationism at school involves indoctrinating children. I still remember being told that "God is always watching us and can punish us if we act or think wrongly". It makes me laugh when certain Creationists complain about CCTV cameras everywhere or the government spying on us all. Beliefs like Creationism were the Big Brother and the CCTV cameras of their day, were used to control the working classes. Now George W Bush is talking about teaching Creationism in schools in the USA instead of evolution. I can't help feeling all he really wants to do is create a brainwashed army to fight a religious war against Muslims.
A certain Creationism-believing journalist equates anyone who believes in evolution with genocidal murderers, tells us how narrow-minded they are. That's funny, because the religious people I've met are some of the most narrow-minded, snobbish, hypoctrical bigots I've ever had the misfortune the come across.
by Stormsworder December 6, 2006
A word that refers ONLY to the specific creation myth that the world was created as per the book of Genesis, and the people who try to defend that story as the literal truth.
"Creationism is contradictory in the simple fact that it attempts to discredit science, while at the same time trying to use science to justify it's position."
by devilzukin December 4, 2003
1. The idea that all the Ph.D. scientists on the planet, who actually spent 10-30 years of their lives getting an education in science and making real discoveries, are intellectually inferior and biased in comparison to 14- to 18-year-old impressionable christian youths and sexually frustrated right-wingers who barely graduated from high school who easily fall for hoaxes which are assumed to be "evidence" for bible literalism and against the rest of science.
2. A conspiracy theory which suggests that all the scientists on the planet are corroborating on a scheme to turn the public away from their belief in God via the theory of evolution (not only atheist scientists, but Christian, Muslim, Jewish and Hindu scientists are in on this anti-God scheme; go figure). Of course, like all conspiracy theories, you will be accused of being naive by the paranoid masses if you happen to use your brain and actually think about how it's not only impossible for thousands of people to be in on a lie without a single one of them having the scruples to come forward and expose said lie, but also impossible for snakes to talk.
2. A conspiracy theory which suggests that all the scientists on the planet are corroborating on a scheme to turn the public away from their belief in God via the theory of evolution (not only atheist scientists, but Christian, Muslim, Jewish and Hindu scientists are in on this anti-God scheme; go figure). Of course, like all conspiracy theories, you will be accused of being naive by the paranoid masses if you happen to use your brain and actually think about how it's not only impossible for thousands of people to be in on a lie without a single one of them having the scruples to come forward and expose said lie, but also impossible for snakes to talk.
1. Creationist: "Did you know Darwin recanted evolution on his deathbed? That proves evolution is wrong and creationism is true!"
Someone who doesn't have his head up his own ass: "That claim was refuted over 100 years ago. And you wonder why scientists don't take you morons seriously?"
2. Creationist: "What? You mean you DON'T believe in fire-breathing dragons and a global flood which has no evidence? You mean you actually believe what scientists say about science and not my pastor? What's wrong with you? Well don't worry, I'll pray for you."
Someone who doesn't have his head up his own ass: "That claim was refuted over 100 years ago. And you wonder why scientists don't take you morons seriously?"
2. Creationist: "What? You mean you DON'T believe in fire-breathing dragons and a global flood which has no evidence? You mean you actually believe what scientists say about science and not my pastor? What's wrong with you? Well don't worry, I'll pray for you."
by Awesome Dog August 12, 2008
Creationism explained:
God + Adam + Eve -times- Cane -minus- Abel + Seth -divided by- Lilith -times- Eve's sister-in-law -divided by- dinosaurs -times- 42 -times- E=mc2 -divided by- Infinity + H2O -times- Monosodiumglutinate -minus- The Monolith + hot air + the sound of a honking horn + The Secret Ingredient -minus- your opposable thumb = ALL THAT IS AND EVER SHALL BE! AMEN!
I hope that clears things up for you.
God + Adam + Eve -times- Cane -minus- Abel + Seth -divided by- Lilith -times- Eve's sister-in-law -divided by- dinosaurs -times- 42 -times- E=mc2 -divided by- Infinity + H2O -times- Monosodiumglutinate -minus- The Monolith + hot air + the sound of a honking horn + The Secret Ingredient -minus- your opposable thumb = ALL THAT IS AND EVER SHALL BE! AMEN!
I hope that clears things up for you.
According to the Religious Right, "evolution" was just Darwin trying to explain his wife to his friends and the idea caught on! "Creationism" is, of course, the ONE TRUE and ONLY explanation for human existance. Anybody who says otherwise should have their opposable thumbs chopped off!
by Carl J. Maltese October 2, 2007
Example of Creationism:
Magic man: Hocus pocus Universe!!!
Magic man: Hocus pocus Solar system!!!
Magic man: Hocus pocus Apple pie!!!
Magic man: Hocus pocus Beer!!!
Magic man: Hocus pocus P0rn!!!
Magic man: Hocus pocus Paper towl!
Magic man: Hocus pocus Earth!
Magic man: Hocus pocus Man!!!
Man: Thank you Magic man your the greatest.
Magic man: MORE BEER!!!!
Man: Hocus pocus baseball!
Magic man: Wow good one!
Magic man: EVEN MORE BEER!!!!
Magic man: Hocus pocus Universe!!!
Magic man: Hocus pocus Solar system!!!
Magic man: Hocus pocus Apple pie!!!
Magic man: Hocus pocus Beer!!!
Magic man: Hocus pocus P0rn!!!
Magic man: Hocus pocus Paper towl!
Magic man: Hocus pocus Earth!
Magic man: Hocus pocus Man!!!
Man: Thank you Magic man your the greatest.
Magic man: MORE BEER!!!!
Man: Hocus pocus baseball!
Magic man: Wow good one!
Magic man: EVEN MORE BEER!!!!
by Arch Magos September 22, 2012