Canadian Housewife

A stay at home mom who can't cook, clean nor supervise her 5+ children. Her husband eventually gives up and walks, but not without paying her child support. She makes new friends who in turn take advantage of her and her money. She and her girlfriends smoke like a coal plant. She eats take-out or orders delivery. The entire house is a disgusting mess. There are cigarette burns in the carpet, many many old food containers, old moldy dirty dishes piling in the sink, stains on the wall and the smell of stale nicotine permeates the air. The kids are unwashed. Their clothing are hand-me-downs of various out-dated styles. She's on anti-depressants and whole other cocktail of meds. She writes many letters to Oprah asking for help and money, which all go unanswered.

Building Inspector: What the fuck happened to this house!!!!!??? It's such a pig sty.

Landlord: Canadian Housewife.

Building Inspector: BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRFFFFFFFFFFF!!!!!!!

Landlord: Thanks a lot now I'll have to clean that up too.

by Nonchalant Ego March 25, 2010