The transformation of previously diverse, interesting and cool urban areas into packaged and contrived suburban sameness, one cloned pseudo-trendy chic boutique and café at a time.
Listening to Parker and Logan only poured salt in my wounds at how Banana Republicanization has completely ruined San Francisco.
Parker: Let’s Uber to a café on Valencia Street for an organic-pour-over-single-source-fair-market-turmeric-agave coffee.
Logan: Which fauxhemian café? The one at the corner of 11th? 12th? 13th? 14th? 15th? 16th…?
Parker: That new one, Clones. Besides, I need product for my beard and some vinyl from next door at Posers. You know, the place with the tastefully arranged retro dusty junk from dad’s garage.
Logan: Perfect! Isn’t it great, living in the City? I’m so glad we don’t live in a superficial, contrived place like LA.
Parker: I know, let’s wear our matching custard brown jeans, $300 sneakerboots, and black start-up t-shirts.
Posesterfauxhemianclonepseudohemian clueless
Parker: Let’s Uber to a café on Valencia Street for an organic-pour-over-single-source-fair-market-turmeric-agave coffee.
Logan: Which fauxhemian café? The one at the corner of 11th? 12th? 13th? 14th? 15th? 16th…?
Parker: That new one, Clones. Besides, I need product for my beard and some vinyl from next door at Posers. You know, the place with the tastefully arranged retro dusty junk from dad’s garage.
Logan: Perfect! Isn’t it great, living in the City? I’m so glad we don’t live in a superficial, contrived place like LA.
Parker: I know, let’s wear our matching custard brown jeans, $300 sneakerboots, and black start-up t-shirts.
Posesterfauxhemianclonepseudohemian clueless
by The Original Tankboy October 14, 2017