The most MLG dank meme of 2015, 2016 and early 2017. He has a big, fat, black, juicy, rounded, throbbing nose making him the most attractive being in the universe.
OMG LOOK AT THAT GUYS NOSE HE MUST BE SQUIDWARD
by MEEEEMES March 9, 2017
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Where you drop your balls over someones nose and let you dick hang as their nose
Guy: Hey. He passed out wanna give him the squidward?
Guy2: HELL YA THEN WE CAN TAKE A PICTURE OF IT!
by ESwagmeout! December 30, 2011
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God

...you are hearing this from an atheist.

Squidward is God.
Do not deny it. You know the truth.
Squidward is God, and Squilliam (God's highschool nemesis/powner) is the Antichrist.
by Bill (A.K.A. Scallop) January 20, 2012
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Someone who is grumpy all the time, a real stick in the mud. Someone who is tired of life and hates people, more notably, people who work at retail stores that have cash registers.

They usually scan your items as fast as they can with a crude face and don’t bother to greet you. If you see a guy who acts rude and handles your groceries wrong, he’s most likely a Squidward

A Squidward can also mean someone who’s very rude, very stale and doesn’t give a fuck
Joe: hey that one guy just bumped into me and didnt say sorry. Instead he looked at me with this dark glare. He’s such a Squidward....

Rebecca: hey you wanna go to the mall later? I’m bringing 3 of my friends who are guys.

Saviento: with 3 of your friends? Nah I’d rather sit at home watching Elmo as I cut my penis off. You guys have fun in that little hell hole.

Rebecca: OMG you’re such a Squidward!!

Cashier: *throws items into bags* “59.97$...”
Me: hey everything okay man?

Cashier: “yeah, I’m just feeling kinda squidward today”
by Hitler the great June 10, 2020
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A misunderstood hexopus that only wishes to gain some respect yet nobody gives him any not even from the fandom could be a very sweet kind and caring person deep down UuU (except for the person who wrote this)
Squidward: CANT I GET THE SLIGHTEST BIT OF RESPECT?!
most of the fandom: No!
by True squidward fan #1 October 18, 2017
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A sexual act where a man uses a raw squid tube as a condom then engages in anal sex and ejaculates in the squid. Afterwards, him or his partner eat the semen filled squid tube.

The remains of the squid is considered a delicacie and is often fought over.
Me and my boyfriend did the squidward last night. The asshole didn't share any of the squid .
by Cosbycosplay January 1, 2016
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The act of placing the testicles and penis over someone's eyes and nose to make them appear to be squidward tentacles.
Hey babe, can I squidward you later??

He's really cute, I wonder if he'd let me squidward him?
by tentacle90 April 15, 2014
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