According to all known laws of aviation there’s no way a bee should be able to fly 

The start of the bee movie script

Person 1: stop texting me
Person 2: According to all known laws of aviation there’s no way a bee should be able to fly
Person 1: *blocks*

According to all known laws of aviation there’s no way a bee should be able to fly by Pearl the Axolotl September 7, 2021

According to Theory 

A phrase that can potentially be used at the end of a sentence to potentially be an asshole.

Usually used after a fact or bold statement.

Dude Who Wants To Gain Knowledge: "Hey bro! What was the cause of extinction for dinosaurs?"

Asshole: "A large meteorite struck the earth, according to theory."

Or for even the more practical use:

Dude Who Wants To Gain Knowledge: "Hey what time does the movie start?"

Asshole: "7:05 according to theory."

Dude Who Wants To Gain Knowledge: "No need to be a douche"

Asshole: "Come at me bro!"

According to Theory by BillCosby'sBrosef February 28, 2011

According to Jim 

The worst show ever made. John Belushi's talentless brother plays a fat ugly ass slob inexplicably married to a slim blonde model. Literally more laughs in Schindler's List.

Mike: It's 8:00, my favorite show According to Jim is on!
Steve: wtf that show sucks!
Mike: I huff paint fumes and my parents are brother and sister.

According to Jim by Blasto the Wonder Dog February 23, 2011

according to script 

To go according to plan

How can they say the Iraq Was is not going according to script? There was no plan in the first place

according to script by Bill Peters November 6, 2006

According to Sophocles, I gotta get outta here!!! 

This phrase is used when you are caught up in your words, and aren't making any sense, and you need to get out as soon as possible, so you decide to turn to a famous playright to make yourself look educated and get out of the situation before it is too late!!!

"If you have a goat as a pet, it will eat everything!" "Well, DUH, that's why they call them goats!!!" OH god, according to Sophocles, I GOTTA GET OUTTA HERE!!!!

According to Sophocles, I gotta get outta here!!! by According to Sophocles... December 31, 2008

According to Google 

"According to Google" (A2G in txt speech) is what you say when you have used Google to look up the answer to a question someone asks you, or a statement they made that you believe to be false.

1: What is the weather in Cincinnati today?

49 degrees and overcast, According to Google

2: Kristina: 5 km is 3.2 miles

Mike: Actually 5 km is 3.10685596 miles A2G.

According to Google by valleymd September 23, 2012

According to WHO 

1 out of 1 person who has an Iphone 12 promax 256 gb upgrades to iphone 13 promax 512 gb

According to WHO, 1 out of 1 person who has an Iphone 12 promax 256 gb upgrades to iphone 13 promax 512 gb

According to WHO by Omsimbarabida June 20, 2022