the comand'r's definitions

premodel

A political term for the condition of a house that needs a lot of work/repair.

Paige: That house is in a beautiful location but needs a lot of work inside.

Jillian: Ya, I think the owners are in the premodel stage, though they have been there for 8 years…

by the comand'r August 20, 2022

cough comet

A projectile that unintentionally flies out of your mouth when you cough. Typically, a piece of food which flies out and usually at an inopportune moment. Also known as a coughmet.

Last week, I was at a conference and Tony was introducing me to a potential investor. He was some Swedish guy and was snacking on some hor d'oeuvres. I was shaking his hand and I think something got caught in his throat because he coughed and something flew out of his mouth right at me. My catlike reflexes allowed me to dodge his cough comet as to avoid having a splotch of chutney land on my forehead.

by the comand'r November 15, 2013

walking like a penguin

The walk, or waddle, one does as a huge shit is approaching which has come on without a solid release plan causing them to clinch they butt cheeks and seek the closest toilet for evacuation.

Luke sure had a rough day at school today. Poor kid was locked out of the bathroom in the gym, so everyone was cracking up as he was walking like a penguin back to class to use the crapper there. I think I heard a shart fart as he crossed the playground.

by the comand'r October 10, 2016

stay-cup

Opposite of a go-cup. A cup that is typically quite large, e.g. 32 oz. plus in volume and filled with booze which is used to discourage someone from leaving.

Amy: Drew has been drinking all day, and has maintained a nice buzz through the day.

Lisa: Ya, we went to breakfast and he started with bloody's at Maudie's and then I went boot shopping with the girls and Drew went over to watch the game with his college buddies. Apparently, he was going to leave at half-time, though they served him a screwdriver stay-cup, so he lasted to the end of the game. Ubered over with his go-cup. And here we are.

by the comand'r November 17, 2019

Throw a piss

Urinate

Dude, where’s the head. I gotta throw a piss.

by the comand'r November 29, 2019

Couplegänger

More rare to see than a doppelgänger as it is a couple that is the spitting image of another couple

Barney: Cartman, check out that couple who just walked in. It is the spitting image of Eric and Melissa. Crazy, as they missed their flight and could not meet us here in Pompei, and there they are.

Cartman: Whoa, that is insane. She is wearing the same dress that Melissa has and the dude is wearing a pork pie hat and snapping photos, just like Eric. Total Couplegänger!

by the comand'r June 10, 2025

grandmapedia

Similar to wikipedia, though not anywhere near as factual. Grandmapedia is knowledge that is not available on the internet, as Grandma is not connected to the Internet and generates her own facts and content.

Grandma: The Rolling Stones band is very well educated. You know Mick Jagger has two PhDs.
Daughter: No, mom. I don't think that is accurate.
Grandma: Yes it is. The whole band is highly educated
Grand daughter: I find that hard to believe.
Grandma: Keith Richards also graduated with some great degrees.
Son: I believe that this is factual according to grandmapedia, though may not be available on wikipedia.

by the comand'r February 2, 2018