4 definitions by ted hamer

Top Definition
Derived from the word shlong (a penis). The word shling is an insulting term for an exceptionally small penis. The word was popularised by a former girlfriend of the amateur musician, Ted Hamer who ridiculed his ludicrously small member. Little wonder that he spent those long nights alone playing with his organ.
You call that a shlong! It's more of a shling!
by Ted Hamer June 21, 2004
The phenomenon where at a party, the most attractive bird is invariably accompanied by her equally hideous mate.
Blimey! She's a beauty but oh my days, what the hell is that monstrosity?
by Ted Hamer June 22, 2004
The horrific and often timberfelling image of two men attempting a DP in a grumbleflick when their knackers collide.
Is that? Oh my God, I can't bear to look!
by Ted Hamer June 22, 2004
this simple and common word is defined best by the euphoria one experiences whilst pumping ones hard earned coinage into the relentlessly sticky whore known as party time
it may be a average,partially cloudy sunday afternoon, following a disgustingly hard week at ones place of work when all of a sudden an overwhelming urge surpasses you to relieve yourself of well earnt cash by giving it straight to "astra" whom in return will leave you with a feeling of emptiness, loneliness and regret yet at the same time a strange sense of satisfaction and safe in the knowledge that you wil never return to that whore at any cost ( until next weekend ) when you shall join the Party once more thus continue parting
by ted hamer June 22, 2004
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