nicholas d's definitions
John: "Duuuuude. Last night I consumed a considerable quantity of ethanol. I mean I was totally shit-faced."
Kevin: "What the hell, man, there are kids around. Watch your language. Shit is a terrible word to say. For fuck's sake you inconsiderate cunt."
John: "Oh my bad, I mean fecal-faced. I was drunk as a skunk."
Kevin: "Word to your mother."
Kevin: "What the hell, man, there are kids around. Watch your language. Shit is a terrible word to say. For fuck's sake you inconsiderate cunt."
John: "Oh my bad, I mean fecal-faced. I was drunk as a skunk."
Kevin: "Word to your mother."
by Nicholas D June 19, 2011
Get the fecal-faced mug.1) A phrase that means one plans to engage in the trade of metal treating in the future
2) Someone who is skilled at writing legal documents regarding the passage of one’s estate after death
3) To bitch slap someone in the way that Chris Rock was slapped at the 2022 Oscars
2) Someone who is skilled at writing legal documents regarding the passage of one’s estate after death
3) To bitch slap someone in the way that Chris Rock was slapped at the 2022 Oscars
Apothecary: “So you’re almost done with your apothecary training! Ready to open your own shop in town?”
Apprentice: “Nah dogg apothecarying is boring AF. More like apothe-idontcare-ying. I think I will smith.”
Apothecary: “Shut your mouth, you scoundrel! If you dishonor my trade again, I’ll will smith you so hard you’ll wish you’d hired a will smith!”
Apprentice: “Nah dogg apothecarying is boring AF. More like apothe-idontcare-ying. I think I will smith.”
Apothecary: “Shut your mouth, you scoundrel! If you dishonor my trade again, I’ll will smith you so hard you’ll wish you’d hired a will smith!”
by Nicholas D April 11, 2022
Get the will smith mug.If Eugene keeps rolling around on that nerd chariot wearing that fanny pack, he won't have a chance with the ugliest most desperate girl on the Mt. Holyoke fuck truck.
by Nicholas D October 8, 2006
Get the nerd chariot mug.Matt: "I bet I can streak through downtown with my peter out for two hours without getting arrested."
Frank: "I doubt it. After running for a half hour or so, you'll probably peter out and then the cops will catch you."
Frank: "I doubt it. After running for a half hour or so, you'll probably peter out and then the cops will catch you."
by Nicholas D March 9, 2009
Get the peter out mug.A person whose main goal in life is to post first on an internet video, picture, or anything else that allows comments. Usually this person will simply post "First!" or something along those lines rather than making an insightful or meaningful comment. First posters, while they themselves often believe that they are serving a valuable purpose and/or accomplishing something by being first, are generally disrespected by much of the rest of the online community.
First poster #1: "I was the first to post on a Failblog picture on March 17, 2008. It ended up getting 946 comments."
Neil Armstrong: "Wow, that's really impressive. I was the first person to walk on the moon."
Babe Ruth: "I was the first player to hit 60 home runs in a season AND the first to hit 700 career home runs!"
Albert Einstein: "Well I was the first to prove the relationship between mass and energy as well as many other fundamental principles of the universe that had puzzled scientists since the beginning of time."
Sir Edmund Hillary: "I was the first to climb Mt. Everest."
First poster #1: "What did you do up there?"
Sir Edmund Hillary: "I put up a sign that said 'First!!!' and got my ass back down that mountain. It was freezing up there, dude!"
God: "Well I was the first to create, well, you know, everything in the entire universe."
First poster #2: "Sweet man, congrats. I was the first to comment on that YouTube video of the news anchor accidentally saying 'blow job' on live TV."
Neil Armstrong: "LOL! That video was classic! Epic fail!"
Other commenter: "Shut up, all of you!!! Nobody cares if you're first! Get a life!"
Neil Armstrong: "Wow, that's really impressive. I was the first person to walk on the moon."
Babe Ruth: "I was the first player to hit 60 home runs in a season AND the first to hit 700 career home runs!"
Albert Einstein: "Well I was the first to prove the relationship between mass and energy as well as many other fundamental principles of the universe that had puzzled scientists since the beginning of time."
Sir Edmund Hillary: "I was the first to climb Mt. Everest."
First poster #1: "What did you do up there?"
Sir Edmund Hillary: "I put up a sign that said 'First!!!' and got my ass back down that mountain. It was freezing up there, dude!"
God: "Well I was the first to create, well, you know, everything in the entire universe."
First poster #2: "Sweet man, congrats. I was the first to comment on that YouTube video of the news anchor accidentally saying 'blow job' on live TV."
Neil Armstrong: "LOL! That video was classic! Epic fail!"
Other commenter: "Shut up, all of you!!! Nobody cares if you're first! Get a life!"
by Nicholas D July 27, 2009
Get the first poster mug.A term describing a very unattractive, usually overweight skank. The person in question usually bears resemblance in size or appearance to a cetacean, ungulate, or similar animal, such as a hippo, orca, beluga, manatee, water buffalo, wildebeest, warthog, rhinoceros, or elephant.
"I necessarily didn't wanna bring home any sort of zoo creatures whatsoever. I mean these broads just probably smelled the food at the house." -Mike "The Situation" on "Jersey Shore"
I followed a smokin' hot girl back to her place from the club after pounding Jager bombs all night. By the morning though, she had magically transformed into some kind of enormous zoo creature. She looked so much like a wildebeest that I wasn't totally sure whether I was in her bedroom or the African savanna. I had no choice but to pull the old beat it and beat it move and be swayze before that disgusting swamp donkey awakened from her slumber.
I followed a smokin' hot girl back to her place from the club after pounding Jager bombs all night. By the morning though, she had magically transformed into some kind of enormous zoo creature. She looked so much like a wildebeest that I wasn't totally sure whether I was in her bedroom or the African savanna. I had no choice but to pull the old beat it and beat it move and be swayze before that disgusting swamp donkey awakened from her slumber.
by Nicholas D January 15, 2010
Get the zoo creature mug.Mark: "So how did last night's badminton game go? Looks like you got a fat lip there."
Jim: "Yeah Steve owned me pretty badly. He whacks the old 'cock around pretty good. Once I totally set him up by lobbing it to him right in front of the net. He slammed it straight into my face and I had no time to react..."
(Jim's mom walks in)
"...and I ended up with his 'cock in my mouth!"
Jim's mom: "Well I never! Get out of this house this instant! I will tolerate none of that kind of behavior. You're not welcome home anymore!"
Jim: "Yeah Steve owned me pretty badly. He whacks the old 'cock around pretty good. Once I totally set him up by lobbing it to him right in front of the net. He slammed it straight into my face and I had no time to react..."
(Jim's mom walks in)
"...and I ended up with his 'cock in my mouth!"
Jim's mom: "Well I never! Get out of this house this instant! I will tolerate none of that kind of behavior. You're not welcome home anymore!"
by Nicholas D June 27, 2008
Get the 'cock mug.