If Eugene keeps rolling around on that nerd chariot wearing that fanny pack, he won't have a chance with the ugliest most desperate girl on the Mt. Holyoke fuck truck.
by Nicholas D October 08, 2006
Get the nerd chariotmug. A phrase that means that something is so good that you're awestruck by it to the point where you're so disoriented that you might mistakenly slap your grandmother. If someone takes this literally it could at best cause an awkward situation and at worst cause your entire family to fall apart.
"Woo-wee, shut my mouth, slap your grandma!
There oughta be a law, get the sheriff on the phone
Lord have mercy, how'd she even get them britches on
That honky tonk badonkadonk..."
-Trace Adkins, "Honky Tonk Badonkadonk"
Mom: "Everybody, Jimmy was nice enough to cook us this Thanksgiving turkey!"
Everyone: "Yea, Jimmy! Hip hip hooray!"
Jimmy: "Aw gee guys...Mom, why don't you have the first bite."
Mom: (eating it) "WOW I'll be damned if this isn't the greatest turkey I've ever had! Slap your grandma!"
Jimmy: "OK." ***SMACK!!!*** (pimp-slaps her across the face)
Mom: "Well I never! Jimmy, how could you?"
Dad: "Son, get out of here this instant. You're banished from this family forever."
Jimmy: "But but but..."
Dad: "But but but...SHUT UP!!! Get your elderly-assaulting ass out of my house!"
There oughta be a law, get the sheriff on the phone
Lord have mercy, how'd she even get them britches on
That honky tonk badonkadonk..."
-Trace Adkins, "Honky Tonk Badonkadonk"
Mom: "Everybody, Jimmy was nice enough to cook us this Thanksgiving turkey!"
Everyone: "Yea, Jimmy! Hip hip hooray!"
Jimmy: "Aw gee guys...Mom, why don't you have the first bite."
Mom: (eating it) "WOW I'll be damned if this isn't the greatest turkey I've ever had! Slap your grandma!"
Jimmy: "OK." ***SMACK!!!*** (pimp-slaps her across the face)
Mom: "Well I never! Jimmy, how could you?"
Dad: "Son, get out of here this instant. You're banished from this family forever."
Jimmy: "But but but..."
Dad: "But but but...SHUT UP!!! Get your elderly-assaulting ass out of my house!"
by Nicholas D May 23, 2008
Get the slap your grandmamug. Investigator 1: "Heavens to Betsy!"
Investigator 2: "You didn't seriously just say that. What is it?"
Investigator 1: "From the looks of these financial records, it looks like the mayor embezzled some of the federal grant money he received to build that water gate to protect the town from floods."
Investigator 2: "Really? Well I'll be a monkey's uncle - you're right!"
Investigator 1: "What to call this scandal...I've got it! Because it's a scandal involving a gate, we can add the prefix 'water-' and call it watergate!"
Investigator 2: "No, that's already taken. I think it would be better, since it's a scandal involving water, to add the suffix '-gate' and call it watergate! No, wait, never mind, that's the same thing."
Investigator 1: "Since it's a scandal involving a water gate, let's add the prefix 'water-' and the suffix '-gate' and call it waterwatergategate!"
Investigator 2: "Brilliant! Just rolls right off the tongue."
Investigator 2: "You didn't seriously just say that. What is it?"
Investigator 1: "From the looks of these financial records, it looks like the mayor embezzled some of the federal grant money he received to build that water gate to protect the town from floods."
Investigator 2: "Really? Well I'll be a monkey's uncle - you're right!"
Investigator 1: "What to call this scandal...I've got it! Because it's a scandal involving a gate, we can add the prefix 'water-' and call it watergate!"
Investigator 2: "No, that's already taken. I think it would be better, since it's a scandal involving water, to add the suffix '-gate' and call it watergate! No, wait, never mind, that's the same thing."
Investigator 1: "Since it's a scandal involving a water gate, let's add the prefix 'water-' and the suffix '-gate' and call it waterwatergategate!"
Investigator 2: "Brilliant! Just rolls right off the tongue."
by Nicholas D December 18, 2011
Get the water-mug. Not bona fide; a fluke; a charlatan.
Comes from ESPN's "Fantasy Focus" podcast where Nate "The Say Nay Kid" Ravitz and Matthew "Talented Mr. Roto" Berry play the game "Bona fide or Bonifacio?" In this game, they analyze whether a player has legitimate skills or is just on a lucky hot streak.
Comes from baseball player Emilio Bonifacio, who started off the 2009 season on fire but then faded into obscurity.
Comes from ESPN's "Fantasy Focus" podcast where Nate "The Say Nay Kid" Ravitz and Matthew "Talented Mr. Roto" Berry play the game "Bona fide or Bonifacio?" In this game, they analyze whether a player has legitimate skills or is just on a lucky hot streak.
Comes from baseball player Emilio Bonifacio, who started off the 2009 season on fire but then faded into obscurity.
Dad 1: "Little Johnny had a great first T-Ball game. He got two hits and made a nice play at second base."
Dad 2: "Get out of here. Your kid is totally bonifacio. My kid's team is going to shit all over his bitch-ass team's face next game. You just wait. Then next year when my kid gets to pitch, well haha, let's just say Johnny better not forget his facemask, because he'll be getting a little chin music if you know what I mean. YOUR ASS IS GOIN' DOWN!"
Dad 1: "It's T-Ball, dude, calm down."
Dad 2: "IN YO' FACE MR. BONIFACIO! OH YEAH!"
Dad 2: "Get out of here. Your kid is totally bonifacio. My kid's team is going to shit all over his bitch-ass team's face next game. You just wait. Then next year when my kid gets to pitch, well haha, let's just say Johnny better not forget his facemask, because he'll be getting a little chin music if you know what I mean. YOUR ASS IS GOIN' DOWN!"
Dad 1: "It's T-Ball, dude, calm down."
Dad 2: "IN YO' FACE MR. BONIFACIO! OH YEAH!"
by Nicholas D August 26, 2011
Get the bonifaciomug. A word that those who might be disparagingly called nigger guys can use to refer to each other, but is extremely offensive if anyone else uses it. Refers to a non-African-American person known for using the N-word, such as Michael Richards, Randy Marsh of "South Park," or Mark Fuhrman from the O.J. trial.
Randy Marsh: "Wassup nigga guy."
Michael Richards: "Not much, nigga guy. Hey, I saw you on 'Wheel of Fortune.' Nobody thought that answer was 'naggers'! Nigga guy please!"
Randy Marsh: "For real my nigga guy."
Actual black guy: "What's up, nigga guys?"
Michael Richards: "Oh no you didn't! You can't say that word! Don't you know that the word 'nigga' legally has to be at least 7 words away from the word 'guy'?"
Actual black guy: "But you just..."
Randy Marsh: "So offensive! Some people are just so ignorant!"
Actual black guy: "You nigga guys - I mean Caucasian gentlemen known for using the N-word - have GOT to be kidding me!"
Michael Richards: "Not much, nigga guy. Hey, I saw you on 'Wheel of Fortune.' Nobody thought that answer was 'naggers'! Nigga guy please!"
Randy Marsh: "For real my nigga guy."
Actual black guy: "What's up, nigga guys?"
Michael Richards: "Oh no you didn't! You can't say that word! Don't you know that the word 'nigga' legally has to be at least 7 words away from the word 'guy'?"
Actual black guy: "But you just..."
Randy Marsh: "So offensive! Some people are just so ignorant!"
Actual black guy: "You nigga guys - I mean Caucasian gentlemen known for using the N-word - have GOT to be kidding me!"
by Nicholas D December 17, 2011
Get the nigga guymug. A phrase used to describe a stark difference between two things. Similar to day and night, except it implies an improvement of the situation rather than a deterioration.
Democrat: "Wow, I'm so happy that Obama is in the White House now. The difference in our country's leadership has been night and day."
Republican: "Actually it's been day and night. George W. Bush was the man."
Independent: "You're both wrong. It's been night and night. Both parties are corrupt as hell."
Libertarian: "No, I'd say it's been more of dusk and twilight."
Left-leaning moderate: "You're crazy. It's totally been dusk and dawn."
Normal person: "Seriously guys, shut up."
Republican: "Actually it's been day and night. George W. Bush was the man."
Independent: "You're both wrong. It's been night and night. Both parties are corrupt as hell."
Libertarian: "No, I'd say it's been more of dusk and twilight."
Left-leaning moderate: "You're crazy. It's totally been dusk and dawn."
Normal person: "Seriously guys, shut up."
by Nicholas D March 15, 2009
Get the night and daymug. "Bitch, get off the wood, you're no good
There goes the neighborhood hooker (slut!)
Go ahead and keep your drawers
Givin up the claps and who needs applause
At a time like this, pop the coochie and ya dead
The bitch is a Miami Hurricane head
Sprung, niggas call her 'lips and lungs'
Nappy dugout, get the fuck out
Cause women like you gets no respect
Bitch, you better run a check"
-Ice Cube, "Check Yo Self"
Kevin: "Man, I got the best head ever last night."
Rasheed: "Who was the ho?"
Kevin: "Some crack-smoking chickenhead from The Brook. She was hella broke down, but for a couple of rocks, she hoovered the shit out of my dick."
Rasheed: "For real? What was her name?"
Kevin: "Marqueesha. Marqueesha Johnson."
Rasheed: "The fuck? Break yo' self, fool! That's my sister!" *pulls out gun and points it at Kevin's head*
Kevin: "Sorry man, I had no idea. Just chill."
Rasheed: "Haha! Just messing with you, man." *puts gun away* "My sister gets around like a fucking record. She's been smoking pole since she could walk. Best get yo' shit checked out though. Good chance you got the clap."
Kevin: "Good one. I thought you were really gonna spark metal on my ass. Guess that explains why it itches."
There goes the neighborhood hooker (slut!)
Go ahead and keep your drawers
Givin up the claps and who needs applause
At a time like this, pop the coochie and ya dead
The bitch is a Miami Hurricane head
Sprung, niggas call her 'lips and lungs'
Nappy dugout, get the fuck out
Cause women like you gets no respect
Bitch, you better run a check"
-Ice Cube, "Check Yo Self"
Kevin: "Man, I got the best head ever last night."
Rasheed: "Who was the ho?"
Kevin: "Some crack-smoking chickenhead from The Brook. She was hella broke down, but for a couple of rocks, she hoovered the shit out of my dick."
Rasheed: "For real? What was her name?"
Kevin: "Marqueesha. Marqueesha Johnson."
Rasheed: "The fuck? Break yo' self, fool! That's my sister!" *pulls out gun and points it at Kevin's head*
Kevin: "Sorry man, I had no idea. Just chill."
Rasheed: "Haha! Just messing with you, man." *puts gun away* "My sister gets around like a fucking record. She's been smoking pole since she could walk. Best get yo' shit checked out though. Good chance you got the clap."
Kevin: "Good one. I thought you were really gonna spark metal on my ass. Guess that explains why it itches."
by Nicholas D June 03, 2012
Get the lips and lungsmug.