frank klaune's definitions
Literally, for one to "scratch where it itches", in particular to scratch the genital area. Often seen as a sign of some disgusting disease or STD.
Man, Frank was picking up that chick in the bar, but when he saw her scratch the patch, he flipped her off and left. I think he figured she had VD or crabs or something.
by Frank Klaune November 13, 2004
Get the scratch the patchmug. The protagonist of K.J. Rowling's book. This ignorant teenage zitfaced twit received international acclaim for his masturbatory tendencies.
by Frank Klaune November 13, 2004
Get the Harry Palmermug. An unusual athletic maneuver used for excretion. The "barn dropper" shimmies up the stall wall in a public restroom with a high ceiling. With one foot on top of each side wall and the pants dropped, the barn dropper lets go with the dump. A successful barn drop results in the target (the toilet) sucessfully hit. The barn drop is a common tactic in men's dormitories and frat houses across the USA and often done in the presence of a large, loud drunken crown of well wishers and spectators.
"Damn, the other night we got back to the frat. I heard all this commotion, and there was a huge crowd at the party chanting while Jack was doing a barn drop. He missed the target. The janitor resigned the next day."
by Frank Klaune March 7, 2004
Get the barn dropmug. The off-brown discoloration inside the undershorts. Butt rust, also known as "skid mark" is usually the result of high pressure farting and / or lack of sufficient wiping of the anus.
by Frank Klaune March 5, 2004
Get the butt rustmug. A contemptable situation. Any despised turn of events. The phrase is used in a sarcastic tone and is intended as a portrayal of one's disgust for a given situation.
The vacation sucked. The RV broke down, the dog shit in the tent twice, the weather was hot, then rainy, and we were out of beer. Man, that trip was about as fun as a bouquet of penises.
by Frank Klaune November 23, 2004
Get the bouquet of penisesmug. The highly-underrated, sadly misunderstood, less-well-known stand-in for the popular super-hero, Batman. Shatman, dressed in a toilet tissue cape was conspicuous by the plunger hanging from his utility belt, and led his civilian life as an innocuous, janitor with tourettes syndrome, horn rimmed glasses and voyeuristic tendencies named "Floyd Furpkin". The writers for the comic series used weak plots and suggestive themes and the general public was not amused with such episodes as "exploding toilet mayhem" and "exlax world submission" and thus the series was cancelled in it's first season, relegating Shatman sadly to a lifetime of widely acclaimed obscurity.
SHATMANNNN... da-da-da-da-da-da-da... SHATMANNN... da-da-da-da-da-da-da... SHATMANNN!
by Frank Klaune November 30, 2003
Get the shatmanmug. The act of relieving one's self (urinating) outside. Typically the term is used by truck drivers and travelers who have driven many miles (without a truck stop or rest area) and- needing to piss, they pull over to a side road to "squirt the dirt".
Damn, Frank bought that big-ass 200 ounce bladder buster at the truck stop and the next thing you know, we have to pull over to squirt the dirt.
by Frank Klaune February 2, 2005
Get the squirt the dirtmug.