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brett burkhardt's definitions

Clay Pit

Someone who really needs to clean out before anal but doesn’t.
“Dude, I was so psyched when that chick from the bar said she wanted to do anal but she was a total clay pit and now I need to buy some new sheets.”

Everyone knew that Brent was a clay pit, that’s why they never wanted to fuck him.
by Brett Burkhardt April 27, 2008
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Party Pouter

Someone who spends an entire party bitch about who isn’t there or how late some people are in showing up or how early they are in leaving. This is usually all they talk about which pisses off everyone at the party.
“Don’t invite her, she’s a party pouter and she’ll spend the entire night bitching that her friends aren’t there.”

When Ricardo starting turning into a party pouter the host told him to either leave or shut up.
by Brett Burkhardt April 27, 2008
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Suicide by Slut

Someone who ruins their life by sleeping around in a stupid, careless, and self destructive manner.
The congressman was committing suicide by slut when he took those tranny hookers to the pay by the hour motel just three blocks down from the local tv station.

When Greg told us he doesn’t use condoms with the skanks he brings home from the bar we all knew he was committing suicide by slut.
by Brett Burkhardt April 27, 2008
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Rich Rage

When a rich person, or a person who just thinks they are rich, bitches about things and expects special favors because they think they’re crazy rich.
You know someone’s going into a rich rage when they start talking about how much money they have in the bank.

“I demand to talk to your supervisor! How dare you put a hold on my credit card for my payment being a little late! Do you know how much of your company’s stock I own? I have over $3 million in your bank!”
“One moment sir....Hey, I’ve got a douche on the line who’s worked himself up into a major rich rage...yeah, he’s pissed that his card won’t work but his account is over 38 days delinquent and his checking is negative and his savings is empty....yeah...he’s a real tool.”
by Brett Burkhardt April 27, 2008
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Memo Discrepancy

When someone makes statements about their accounts that are complete lies but, because you can’t say that in the notes or to the customer, you have to call it a memo discrepancy.
“This bitch says called the other day and that she’d gotten some rep to wave her fees but she never called in once. Can I say she’s a lying whore in the memos?”
“No, just say it’s a memo discrepancy and then specify what didn’t match up. Otherwise you’ll get your ass in trouble.”
by Brett Burkhardt April 27, 2008
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2 Beer Bisexual

A guy who starts to act out his bisexual desires after just one or two drinks.
The guys at Alpha Sig didn’t care that Mark was bi, they just wished he would be honest about it instead of being a 2 Beer Bisexual who uses drinking as an excuse to be his real self.
by Brett Burkhardt April 27, 2008
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Bathroom Blather

When a person insists on having a long, drawn out, pointless conversation on their cell phone when going to the bathroom, especially if it is a public bathroom.
"Dude, is there another bathroom here?"
"No, why?"
"There's some asshole in there talking on his cell phone and I just couldn't take a leak."
"Bathroom blather is so fucking rude."

When I heard I toilet flush I knew that this conversation was just bathroom blather.
by Brett Burkhardt May 12, 2008
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