It’s a well-known fact that many families receiving Food Stamps
eat like millionaires. While most of the population gets by on fatty ground beef and frozen dinners, Food Stampers feast on Filet Mignon
, New York Strip, lobster tails and crab legs. If eating like this still isn’t enough to spend their entire monthly food handout, they then resort to throwing parties and cookouts just to use up the stamps. Of course, the concept of not spending every dime of their government handout, stocking up on non-perishables, or donating some of the excess food to a charitable organization is out of the question.
“Awesome! I just got invited to C’s cookout again! Last time I went, I had a couple Food Stamp Filets at her house, then she gave me four more to take home!”
Collecting Welfare, Social Security and Child Support every month, without ever lifting a finger – except for going to the mailbox and the bank.
“Wow, since she figured out who the father is, she’s been riding the Trailer Trash Trifecta!”
The act of becoming pregnant, usually by a girl in her mid to late teens, for the sole purpose of receiving a steady, life-long income without ever learning a skill or landing a job. These women usually have between three and five children, simply because more kids equals more cash. Most of them were ‘meal-tickets’ themselves as they were growing up, and were taught the 'ins and outs' of the Welfare system by their very own, stay at home, white-trash mamas. Income typically comes from Welfare and Social Security, but if they’re lucky enough to track down the father, they can hit the ‘Trailer Trash Trifecta’ with Child Support.
“How can she survive with only two kids? Doesn’t she know that planned motherhood requires more kids? She’s almost 20!”
Beautiful, voluptuous women that you find impossible to resist… but… they have a ‘look’ that says they’ve ‘been around the block’ a few too many times. Although having sex with them is very tempting, your inner voice keeps warning you that something evil lurks inside, and you’ll probably end up contracting AIDS or some other serious STD if you’re not very careful – so you’d better double up on the condoms.
Man 1: “See ya tomorrow morning. I just got an offer I can’t refuse from those two babes!”
Man 2: “Make sure you wear a condom on your condom. They look like a couple Trojan Whores to me!”
A severe allergic reaction, usually found on the upper thighs or ass cheeks, brought about by any amount of money ‘burning a hole in your pocket.’ The only known cure is to spend every cent of your Welfare check, Social Security check or Paycheck before midnight on payday – no matter what your financial obligations might be. Purchases generally include such low-rent essentials as cigarettes, lottery tickets, liquor, drugs, new release DVDs or CDs. Expenses such as rent, car payments, insurance, clothing or food are not considered to be essentials and therefore are not factored into the equation.
“Ouch! I gotta buy some cigarettes, DVDs and lottery tickets, quick - before I get a cash rash! I had a lot of overtime this week!”
When your sleazy, white trash, welfare-dependant daughter comes back to roost at your home with her five illegitimate children – because she just can’t make ends meet on four handouts alone.
With the cost of everything rising, public assistance from Welfare, Social Security, Food Stamps and Child Support is no longer allowing her to live the way that she had been accustomed – and the single-wide trailer has just been repossessed!
It’s sad, but once the essentials such as cigarettes, beer, drugs, snacks, lottery tickets, magazines and pre-paid cell phone cards are purchased, there never seems to be enough money left over for the non-essentials such as rent, utilities, gas or car repairs.
Man1: I heard that C moved back in with you, with all the kids.
Man 2: Yep, The Spread Eagle Has Landed!
. Taken from two definitions of the word Just
Definition 1: Barely; by a narrow margin; within a brief period of time; only; merely
Definition 2: Legal; legitimate; guided by justice; in accordance with standards; right; lawful; proper
Man 1: “You’d better stay away from her, or you’ll end up in jail!”
Man 2: “No worries, I checked her out. She’s Just Just!”