Valintino the Big Surpremo's definitions
The most vile, disgusting, putrid shit on the face of the Earth! I bet prison food tastes better than this slop (Hell, it might even be healthier!)! Here is a rundown of the "food" school has to offer:
Burgers: Nasty as fuck! I bet the burgers are 70% shit, 25% rubber, and 5% beef by-products.
Chicken sandwiches: Sort of like burgers, but actually somewhat edible.
Soups: See urine.
Raw fruit and vegetables: The only actual food on the menu. They actually taste good and they're handy for calming your stomach down.
Cooked vegetables: P.U.!!! Cooked vegetables are as stinky as a skunk's ass! Everyone in my school (including me) has to hold their nose to keep themselves from puking and passing out from the stinky-ass fumes the cooked vegetables emit!
Milk: Expired, and I bet it's semen, not milk.
Pasta, mashed potatoes, etc.: Cold, moldy, shitty, you get the idea.
Burgers: Nasty as fuck! I bet the burgers are 70% shit, 25% rubber, and 5% beef by-products.
Chicken sandwiches: Sort of like burgers, but actually somewhat edible.
Soups: See urine.
Raw fruit and vegetables: The only actual food on the menu. They actually taste good and they're handy for calming your stomach down.
Cooked vegetables: P.U.!!! Cooked vegetables are as stinky as a skunk's ass! Everyone in my school (including me) has to hold their nose to keep themselves from puking and passing out from the stinky-ass fumes the cooked vegetables emit!
Milk: Expired, and I bet it's semen, not milk.
Pasta, mashed potatoes, etc.: Cold, moldy, shitty, you get the idea.
1: Lunch lady 1: We are out of dog poo for the burgers!
Lunch lady 2: Just use cat poo, they won't know the difference.
2: Delivery man: What should I do with this jug of goat sperm?
Lunch lady: Just write "ranch" on it.
3: Lunch lady 1: What are we going to do with this skunk juice, garlic, limburger cheese, 20 year old sweat socks, fish guts, and all this leftover shit and piss?
Lunch lady 2: Just put in a blender and then put it on the cooked vegetables.
school lunch
Lunch lady 2: Just use cat poo, they won't know the difference.
2: Delivery man: What should I do with this jug of goat sperm?
Lunch lady: Just write "ranch" on it.
3: Lunch lady 1: What are we going to do with this skunk juice, garlic, limburger cheese, 20 year old sweat socks, fish guts, and all this leftover shit and piss?
Lunch lady 2: Just put in a blender and then put it on the cooked vegetables.
school lunch
by Valintino the Big Surpremo September 11, 2010
Get the school lunch mug.According to what school tells you: A great man who accidentally discovered America when no one else could find it.
Reality: A greedy piece of genocidal shit who wasn't the first person to find America, the Native Americans discovered America before anyone else and after the Native Americans found America, vikings discovered America, and a several explorers found it too. But for some reason, Columbus ends up taking all the credit for something the Native Americans discovered.To add insult to injury, he ends up enslaving a bunch of Native Americans to take to Spain as slaves (this is 100% true) and his Spanish sailors and him killed approximately 8 million Native Americans (also true) Talk about some major bullshit.
Reality: A greedy piece of genocidal shit who wasn't the first person to find America, the Native Americans discovered America before anyone else and after the Native Americans found America, vikings discovered America, and a several explorers found it too. But for some reason, Columbus ends up taking all the credit for something the Native Americans discovered.To add insult to injury, he ends up enslaving a bunch of Native Americans to take to Spain as slaves (this is 100% true) and his Spanish sailors and him killed approximately 8 million Native Americans (also true) Talk about some major bullshit.
Teacher: And that's how Christopher Columbus discovered America when no one else did.
4th grader: *raises his hand*
Teacher: Yes, Timmy?
4th grader: Didn't the Native Americans discover America first?
Teacher: Nope, it was Columbus!
4th grader: I'm pretty sure it was the Native Americans.
Teacher: I SAID IT WAS COLUMBUS!!!
4th grader: But-
Teacher: THAT IS IT! YOU ARE GOING TO WRITE "Columbus discovered America, not the Native Americans." 50 TIMES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
4th grader: *raises his hand*
Teacher: Yes, Timmy?
4th grader: Didn't the Native Americans discover America first?
Teacher: Nope, it was Columbus!
4th grader: I'm pretty sure it was the Native Americans.
Teacher: I SAID IT WAS COLUMBUS!!!
4th grader: But-
Teacher: THAT IS IT! YOU ARE GOING TO WRITE "Columbus discovered America, not the Native Americans." 50 TIMES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
by Valintino the Big Surpremo September 1, 2010
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by Valintino the Big Surpremo August 30, 2010
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A extremely tough and badass gang in the warriors movie and video game. They are very skilled at using baseball bats as weapons and they dress up in baseball uniforms and wear face paint. They are also very quiet. The basic soldiers wear white outfits, while the lieutenants wear black outfits. Another noteworthy feature of the base ball furies is that the members' nicknames are inspired by baseball players (Ruth,Mickey,Cobb,etc). The leader of the baseball furies is a large,silent, muscular man known as Cobb. Cobb dresses up as an umpire and uses two baseball bats that are taped/tied together as a surprisingly destructive weapon. The baseball furies are known,respected, and feared as one of the toughest gangs in all of NYC (in the warriors movie and video game of course).
Ajax: I'm going to shove that baseball bat up your ass and turn you into a Popsicle.
Baseball Fury Soldier: *Shows off with his bat*
baseball furies
Baseball Fury Soldier: *Shows off with his bat*
baseball furies
by Valintino the Big Surpremo September 18, 2010
Get the baseball furies mug.Seperoith
Justin Bieber
Facebook
Twilight series
Kimbo Slice
Hannah Montana
Jonas Brothers
American Idol
Cloud
Sonic the Hedgehog
Lady Gaga
These are all overrated people and things.
Justin Bieber
Twilight series
Kimbo Slice
Hannah Montana
Jonas Brothers
American Idol
Cloud
Sonic the Hedgehog
Lady Gaga
These are all overrated people and things.
by Valintino the Big Surpremo August 30, 2010
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