Definitions by Uncle Joosie
Resting Charlatan Face
Appearing on CPAN, Preacher of the House Mike "Tiny" Johnson got his ass chewed out (not in a good way) by furious, conservative callers, who dragged him for filth over keeping the House out-of-session and blocking the Epstein discharge petition. one after the other, angry people told Mike he's a fucking idiot and my dude just sat there with Resting Charlatan Face like he was staring at a Burger King drive-up menu written in French.
Resting Charlatan Face by Uncle Joosie October 10, 2025
Babysitter Principle
Donald Trump aka Casino Mobster hired numerous corrupt associates like Whiskey Pete Hegseth and "Not You" Tulsi Gabbard and Pam Bondi (currently stinking up government and committing felonies by the hour) who are acting like ornery toddlers whose babysitter is passed out drunk in the laundry room while kids in her charge are setting fire to the house. in other words, the Babysitter Principle means criminals are running the show and have absolutely no supervision over their malfeasance.
Babysitter Principle by Uncle Joosie September 20, 2025
Resting Chud Hands
Whenever Apartheid Clyde is on a panel or being interview by some right-wing fuckface, he places hands together with fingertips touching like he's "deep in thought" when in actuality he's a nudnik fucking high as a kite on Ketamine and uppers. Unlike Casino Mobster and Resting Vagina Hands, Resting Chud Hands is his way of conveying a false veneer of intellectual contemplation when in actuality he's just dumb as a fucking stump.
Resting Chud Hands by Uncle Joosie March 28, 2025
Dalmatian Shake
Bob finished a bubble bath and his partner Karla was brushing her teeth. After he got out, Karla told him to "do the Dalmatian Shake!" and Bob rolled his eyes
Dalmatian Shake by Uncle Joosie March 27, 2025
Excuse Spaghetti
Mike Waltz appeared on Laura Ingraham's White Power Hour on Fixed Noise to toss Excuse Spaghetti on the wall to see what stuck. Waltz, dancing as fast as he could, suggested that Atlantic publisher Jeff Goldberg "infiltrated" the Signal chat rather than being added to it—even though receipts show the latter to be the stone-cold truth.
Excuse Spaghetti by Uncle Joosie March 27, 2025
SignalGate
Casino Mobster's administration, teeming with unqualified-Kremlin hacks, used Signal to discuss a bombing campaign in Yemen and inadvertently added a high-profile journalist to the group chat—who then proceeded to publish receipts of the conversation he saw. SignalGate scandal was born, implicating all of Donald Trump's compromised assets like Whiskey Pete and Tulski Gabbard.
SignalGate by Uncle Joosie March 27, 2025
Dalmatian Shake
Travis the 6-year-old finished up bath time and got out. Bob, his dad, said “do the Dalmatian Shake!” and Travis shook off the bath water just like a Dalmatian who just came out of the lake
Dalmatian Shake by Uncle Joosie March 20, 2025