5 definitions by Super Steve Bishop

Top Definition
Miami Vice was based off of Don Johnson's sophomore year in high school.

Don Johnson's barber attempted to shave him once. After fifty razor blades and eight quarts of shaving cream, he was finally able to remove his five o'clock shadow. This was all on his 3rd birthday.

Don Johnson's good looks are able to bend space and time allowing him to exist in multiple dimensions at once. Unfortunately, Heartbeat isn't popular in any of them.

Don Johnson hates to be called Crockett.

Don Johnson's workout consists of 50 push-ups, 200 sit-ups, and sex with your mom.

The gel in Don Johnson's hair is causing the polar ice caps to melt.

Don Johnson used to bottle his sweat and sell it to single men claiming it will attract women. The product was later renamed Aqua Velva.

Princess Diana's limo swerved, not to avoid the paparazzi, but to avoid Don Johnson's blazer. Even her driver knew it was sacred and dared not run it over.

Don Johnson stole Mother Teresa's virginity. He then pawned it for cocaine.

Don Johnson's nickname for his penis was the basis for Tony The Tiger.

When he first proposed to Melanie Griffith, she said no. Let's just say it ended poorly for her and she soon changed her mind.

While using cocaine, Don Johnson recorded 4 seasons of Miami Vice in a record breaking 12 hours. He won 2 Emmy's and was voted Teacher of the Year.

The first American National Anthem was actually Heartbeat, by Don Johnson. Congress changed it after the powerful lyrics pushed the U.S. into war with Vietnam.

Don Johnson's top score in Centipede is 23,987,004, which was pretty good considering that he got that far on one quarter and three bottles of Rebel Yell.

The East Coast/West Coast Hip-Hop war officially came to an end when Don Johnson told the rappers to SHUT THE FUCK UP!!

Don Johnson doesn't wear socks with his loafers, not because it's fashionable, but because he forgets.
It was not the Grinch, but rather Don Johnson who stole Christmas.

Miami used to be cold. That is until Don Johnson moved there.

After having sex with 50 women one evening, Don Johnson had a revelation. It would later be called The Muppets.

Don Johnson's epic song, Heartbeat, went triple platinum before he even wrote it.

The Book of Genesis details the birth of Don Johnson. The Earth took God 7 days to create. It took him 12 days to create Don Johnson. 10 of those days were spent on the stubble alone and the rest were spent inventing loafers to suit his needs.

The popular movie Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom was based on a summer vacation Don Johnson took to Arizona in 1980.

When asked why he turned down the part of Marty McFly, in Back to the Future, Don Johnson replied: "I already went back in time, and unlike Marty, I had sex with my mother." Don Johnson strives fro realism.
by Super Steve Bishop August 14, 2007
Stands for: Long-Term Male Sexual Abstinence

A condition, typically considered a severe form of long-term virginity, affecting 0.8% of U.S. males approximately 25 years of age or older. Symptoms usually include a combination of the following: the inability to interact with females, shame, depression, loneliness, shyness, and large abundances of pornography (usually very graphic and strange). Clinical research and testing are currently inconclusive as to why males suffer from LTMSA, however it is theorized that an extreme psychological episode from a males’ childhood may be the cause. Previously LTMSA was a relatively unknown condition in mainstream psychohistory until the film “The 40 Year Old Virgin” premiered that brought this condition to the forefront of mainstream research.

LTMSA is credited being first diagnosed in 1955 by Dr. Steven J. Bishop of Georgetown University.
Long-Term Male Sexual Abstinence (LTMSA) usually results in one of two outcomes:
1. Lonely night alone and a bad hand cramp in the morning or
2. Your friends sending out a "Code Orange" alert when there is a possibility for the male in question to lose their virginity.
by Super Steve Bishop January 20, 2008
Sexual Intercourse Borne Improvised Explosive Device (SIBIED) - When a would-be suicide bomber is having sex and just when he is about to climax, he detonates his vest blowing up himself, his partner, and anyone or anything around him.
Dude, I think Abu al-Wombati SIBIED'ed that bitch. That's what she gets for worshiping a Christian God.
by Super Steve Bishop February 04, 2008
A condition, typically considered a severe form of long-term virginity, affecting 0.8% of U.S. males approximately 25 years of age or older. Symptoms usually include a combination of the following: the inability to interact with females, shame, depression, loneliness, shyness, and large abundances of pornography (usually very graphic and strange). Clinical research and testing are currently inconclusive as to why males suffer from LTMSA, however it is theorized that an extreme psychological episode from a males’ childhood may be the cause. Previously LTMSA was a relatively unknown condition in mainstream psychohistory until the film “The 40 Year Old Virgin” premiered that brought this condition to the forefront of mainstream research.

LTMSA is credited being first diagnosed in 1955 by Dr. Steven J. Bishop of Georgetown University.
Long-Term Male Sexual Abstinence (LTMSA) usually results in one of two outcomes:
1. Lonely night alone and a bad hand cramp in the morning or
2. Your friends sending out a "Code Orange" alert when there is a possibility for the male in question to lose their virginity.
by Super Steve Bishop January 18, 2008
A special color code denoting the real-time and/or inevitable lose of a males virginity. This term is reserved for use in only the most severe cases of Long-Term Male Sexual Abstinence (LTMSA). These individuals are usually in their mid to late twenties and/or older (i.e., the majority of male westerners lose their virginity long before their mid twenties, usually in high school or college thanks to hormones, peer pressure, underage drinking, drugs, etc…). This code is usually sent via cell phone text messaging, usually by first hand witnesses, to friends and associates of the male virgin in question in order to inform that after years of LTMSA the virgin has finally entered into adulthood and “popped their cherry.”
Code Orange!! Code Orange!! Chris is finally going to have sex for the first time at the age of 30.

There was a Code Orange situation last night. Paul lost his virginity to some hooker and give her the Fidel Castro.

by Super Steve Bishop January 05, 2008
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