Apparently, if you're a guy in today's society, what you are if you:
1). Make physical contact with another guy in any way for any amount of time
2). Have any interest in things such as poetry or writting
3). Listen to anything except for rap and metal
4). Use words like "love" and "cute"
5). Are still a virgin by the age of 14
6). Go anywhere with your parents
A handshake? What are you, gay?