4 definitions by Mr. Weebitzy

When sitting on the toilet, you reach over to tear off some toilet paper only to find that there's nothing but the cardboard tube, or cob, left on the roll.
There's no shitwipe left on the roll. I've been cobbed!
by Mr. Weebitzy December 8, 2013
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The cardboard tube at the center of the toilet paper roll. The word is possibly derived from the folk custom of wiping one's ass on corn husks or corn cobs, though it is uncommon to perform this operation with a cardboard cob.
My kid needed cardboard tubes for her school craft project, so we used the cobs from our toilet paper rolls.
by Mr. Weebitzy December 8, 2013
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A pair of short, tiny, slutty shorts.
Girl: I got myself a present today.
Guy: What did you get?
Girl: I got a pair of slutty shorts.
Guy: Oh, you got slorts. So, they are a present for me too.
by Mr. Weebitzy April 14, 2014
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Kraftwerk-listening, craft beer-drinking poseurs of a certain age. They dress their toddlers in Ramones t-shirts and jam their middle-aged spread into low-rise skinny jeans.
Those aging hipsters were complaining about the noise at last night's hardcore show.
by Mr. Weebitzy December 28, 2011
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