A wise and hyper-articulate intellectual with refined knowledge and understanding of the world who spends most of his time chain smoking.
The amount of knowledge is often directly correlated with the amount he smokes as he best shares his insights while he is smoking amongst a small crowd of fellow Intellectual Smokestacks.
Me: Duuuude I don't understand how metaphysics relates to this deconstructive analysis of New Comedy
Patrick: Man, just go out the benches in front of the dorm and ask the Intellectual Smokestacks
Me: Good advice they'll know!