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95 definitions by MagickDio

Testicles come in few shapes, more sizes and even more levels of maintenance and cleanliness. Balls have been arranged into categories by people who care about what they put in their mouths. They are defined as follows

Category 1- The creme de la creme of bollocks. Tight, defuzzed, cleaned with some kind of soap and good sized.

Category 2- Trimmed, wiped with a wet flannel and either slightly large or slightly small. A slight smell of sweat is OK, terrible smell will shunt you down to category 4.

Category 3- Untamed, lynxed to within an inch of their lives, size indistinguishable under the 'fro.

Category 4- Scrotum appears to have space for at least 4 more testicles, overpowering rank scent of stale sweat and ignorant of all hair removal methods.

Category 5- Alien nards. Something weird or horrifying, like an extra one, or ropey veins all over.
Oh no, I won't be sleeping with Jeff again. He was lurking in ball category 4!
by MagickDio August 20, 2010
The main objective on a guys night out. To wrangle is to round up. A Ho is a loose woman.

A ho wrangler is a guy with massive easy girl pulling potential, who rarely ever spends a night alone, or with the same person more than twice.

A night of ho wrangling consists of bankrupting yourselves by buying numerous shots for women who are waiting at the bar, hoping that one might want to shag you. You will also dance in a grinding motion behind several women, in an attempt to wrangle them.
Vic's stag night is going to be a full on ho wrangling experience.
by MagickDio August 20, 2010
1) A list of people you want to shag

2)A list of sexual acts, each of which has a number of "points" attached to it. This is usually a list drawn up with a group of mates, and a competition ensues to see who can get the highest score. It's not usually a list of delightful acts to blissfully orgasm your way through, it's designed to be more of a test of endurance. For example, rimming someone over 2 and a half times your age would gain you 200 points, whereas performing full oral servicing on someone 2 and a half times your weight would net you 1000. There's usually a trophy act which involves all holes and someone smokin' hot but it's infinitely easier to nail the god awful stuff.
1) I just added Michael to my hit list, he's delicious.

2)K~ "Ok, I rimmed the 56 year old bloke. Chalk up my 200"

D~ "I made that weird kid cum in his trousers at the bar, which is 100, and tossed that footballer off under the table , which is another 150, so that's 250 for me!"

T~"Well, I gave that 30 stone woman full oral servicing, so I need 1000 points and some kind of super strength mouthwash"
by MagickDio April 27, 2010
Male camel toe. When the seam of the trousers rides up and digs into the scrotum, seperating the testicles so that one is on each side of the offending seam. Thus creating a visual display that is reminiscent of a chipmunk with its cheeks stuffed with food, but not in the slightest bit cute. When it happens suddenly, it is accompanied by an instant look of discomfort and the need to slope off and rearrange ones giblets.
"Guys, wait here, I'm just going round the corner to sort out these chipmunk cheeks"

"Can you SEE that bloke on the barstool?? Look at the chipmunk cheeks! How can he not feel that??"
by MagickDio March 03, 2010
1) The ruined punchline of a joke.
2) The unfunny punchline of a long winded joke
3) The line written which makes no sense and ruins an essay/article/exam
4) The articulate and well thought out phrase which you perfcted in your head and then your mouth spandled the shit out of it, making you sound like you need medication
1) You are the linkest weak, goodbye!

2) You are the weakest link, goodbye!

3) "I failed! FAILED???!! But how??"
"There must be a fuckline in there somewhere."
4) "Oh yes, just like when you drithdrew all the cash and then flimmin'....whatever, yeah, but like YOU did it too, so whatever. Fuck you."

"Jesus, that was quite a fuckline."
by MagickDio May 28, 2012
A serious outburst of unexpected and completely over the top rage. This style of hissy fit was made famous by former No. 1 ranking professional tennis player, John McEnroe, hence the name. To qualify as an episode of McEnrage, it has to happen in public, with witnesses. (That is not to say that Mr McEnroe did not throw his toys out of the pram in private, simply that we do not know if this is the case.) McEnrage can be a classic, all out, red in the face, foaming at the mouth screech fest, or it can be a much less dramatic thing, but with the inclusion of the phrase, "You cannot be SERIOUS!!"
"Why is Jez outside, chain smoking and pacing?"
"Oh my God, you totally missed it! Dude, it was insane. We got to the window and the woman said they were sold out. Instead of getting tickets to the next showing like the rest of us, he just flipped! Started screaming "You cannot be SERIOUS!!" and smacking his hands against that plastic window, swearing and demanding that he be found a seat immediately. That's his spit they're cleaning off the window now!"
"Jesus, proper McEnrage then!"
"Yeah. Fucking Jez, I don't reckon we'll ever be allowed back here now."
by MagickDio May 04, 2012
1) The process by which women rate "weepy" films. The more it makes them cry, be it through sadness, relief, happiness or just because someone had a cute face, the higher the film will rank.

2) The process by which men rate pornographic films. The more it makes them ejaculate, be it through domination, bondage, bukkake or just because someone had a cute ass, the higher the film will rank.
1) "Oh my God, you so have to watch Marley and Me, it's like a five on the tissue test!"

2) "Oh my God, you so have to watch Lesbian Fuckwhores, it's like a five on the tissue test!"
by MagickDio July 17, 2011