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Lig Na Baste's definitions

Final Fantasy VII Fankids

Pigheaded, ignorant sheep-minded fools who refuse to admit that games have improved in the decade since Final Fantasy VII was released. Worship an overhyped video game because it is fashionable to do so. Also tend to target Final Fantasy VI and VIII as the popularity driven trend of hate.

Any attempt to improve or advance the stale, trite formula of: "Stand in a line, pick fight/magic/Item from a menu and wait.
-Or, moving past interface/designs that only existed due to hardware limitations-
are met with fear, irrational rage, insults and a refusal to accept change or improvement.

Immune to logic, common sense, counter arguments or objective, even handed thought.
Final Fantasy VII fankids want Final Fantasy VII over and over with graphical improvements only. They are also arrogant enough to define the entire series by superficial means like "being turn-based".
Nothing will ever be good enough because they don't want it to be and don't care how ignorant and stupid they look.
by Lig Na Baste June 10, 2008
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My Immortal

Fanfiction supposedly written by a one, Terra Gillespie. Though many theorize that this work and it's author are entirely satire.

If it is satire, it is on an Andy Kaufman level of genius.

The story stars Terra as Ebony Dark'Ness Dementia Raven Way. A self described goff (spelling Goth with oddly situational Cockney phonetics) vampire (with straight teeth) who loves Hot Topic and hates herself some "prepz" (A word I never heard anyone, outside of a high school, speak with any sincerity short of A.C. Slater from Saved by the Bell.

The story features many unique and unfortunate points of interest.

1. Virtually every chapter starts with the author yelling and swearing at the reader base. Threatening to stop writing if at least five good reviews aren't posted. Essentially holding crap for hostage.

2. Character names are apparently suggestions. Each character, including her own, is systematically misspelled in a way that puts the greatest telemarketers to shame. Watching her try to spell "McGonagall" is sad, like watching a limbless man in a three legged race.

3. Harry Potter is now a vampire and, in a veritable orgy of creativity, refers to himself as "Vampire".

4. Dumbledore swears like a sailor. Dropping more f-bombs than a Dennis Leary standup set.

5. Voldemort gives Ebony a gun at one point to kill Vampire Potter, and speaks in Ye' Olde Rene Faire Englishe.

6. Ebony is in a gothic metal band called "Bloody Gothic Rose 666". Apparently they sound like a mix of between Good Charlette, Slipknot, My Chemical Romance and really bad idea.
other members are B'loody Mary (her jack off friend), Vampire, Draco, Ron (aka Diabolo) and motherfucking HAGRID (on washboard bass).

7. Apparently the dress code of Hogwarts has been replaced with a giant, magic Hot Topic that Good Charlotte routinely plays concerts at. I also hear Fred and George are now running the Hogsmeade Mall's Spender Gifts selling magic animated porn postcards, tin ankh/pentagram/potleaf jewelry and, fart based boardgames.

8. Many of the 45 chapters are dedicated, almost entirely, to the vampiric clown outfits she swathes herself in.

9. Even though she HATES "prepz" (a term that no one uses outside of high school) all of her favorite bands are ironically NOT Goth. Good Charlotte and My Chemical Romance are pop groups.

10. "I'm not related to Gerard Way but I wish I was, because he's a major fucking hottie."
...Think about that last line...why would you want to be related to someone you thought was sexy!?!?
My Immortal is either the single greatest work of viral satire since Chad Warden Or, the single greatest strike against public school systems to date.
by Lig Na Baste July 16, 2009
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Blizzard CM

"Community Manager"
Basically a glorified Forum Moderator that is connected to Blizzard Developers via a long leash. Like one would find on a dog. A dog however, is slightly more helpful when it comes to tech support and customer service.

Blizzard CM's are known for several things:

1. Canned PR responses.
2. Crappy Logic.
3. Unprofessional, biased moderation of behavior.
4. Razor-thin egos.
5. Followed by a legion of fanbois screaming as if the Beatles have regrouped and decided to devote the bulk of their time together sitting at computers, shepherding vast sums of the biggest morons the gaming community has ever seen, around a poorly maintained and operated message board for a company that makes more money than Europe (the continent, not the band).

Cm's will request positive feedback, in a thread full of complaints posted just inches above fifteen to twenty threads full of said requested feedback. Those positive examples will go forever untouched by said CM. Pointing this fact out, will also be ignored.

If you piss off a CM personally, they will decide to actually give a damn about insults -as a forum rule- long enough to ban you or close your thread. You can tell people to drop dead on every page leading up to that point but, don't insult a CM, their feelings actually matter.

Often times, they'll give a "reason" such as: "This topic is old, if you need to talk about it, post a new thread."
If that logic didn't give you an immediate aneurysm, you may have been born on Krypton.

CM's technical know-how is highly suspect, like the "surgical skills" of a guy working out of his sister's apartment in the Bronx or a Best Buy Geek Squad employee.
All problems are solved by:
1. Deleting your WTF folder. (Called so do the reaction most feel when told that, doing so will solve a problem caused by AT&T's network hub.)
2. Power Cycle your modem.
3. Ping your connection and post it.
If these don't work, try doing them again.
If that doesn't work..try doing them again.

Blizzard CM's are witty too. They like to waste their allotted three valuable posts per annual quarter, by being productive and clever in threads like:
~ If You Could Verbally Suck Off Drysc in a Thread, Which Will Immediately Dissolve into Staggeringly Unfunny Random Crap, Forum Fads and Ancient Memes, Would You Please do it Here. ~

Blizzard Cm's have decided long ago that the Offical Blizzard boards were going to suck and blow harder than Tera Patrick caught in a hurricane.
the place is a joke. Trolls, fanbois and idiots dominate and the CM's don't care.

Any criticism leveled at a CM is immediately cut off at the source and one is directed to wowcmfeedback@blizzard.com.
This is without a doubt the biggest load of transparent crap a CM can drop in a thread.
Simply put anyone who believs this email is going to be read by anyone important is an idiot. The CM's are so bad and so unprofessional that the influx of complaints must be beyond belief and they haven't flushed these turds yet. Your email gets sent to a special inbox where the CM's can have a good chuckle before continuing being impotent figure heads who wait for a random fanboy to make up an excuse for Blizzard's regular bullshit, simply quote it and say, "Yeah, what this guy said!"

At this point CM's post once a week just see the inevitable wave of sycophantic tools show up and agree with them for simply having blue font. It gets bad to the point of self parody. Never mind, that a CM is Blizzard employee who is too inept to actually do anything of value, like a hype man for a video game developer.
Blizzard CM means "community manager" but the only thing these inept fucksticks "manage" to do with any competence, is fuck the place up with their apathetic bullshit.
by Lig Na Baste April 21, 2009
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Final Fantasy VII Fankids

Pigheaded, ignorant sheep-minded fools who refuse to admit that games have improved in the decade since Final Fantasy VII was released. Worship an overhyped video game because it is fashionable to do so. Also tend to target Final Fantasy VI and VIII as the popularity driven trend of hate.

Any attempt to improve or advance the stale, trite formula of: "Stand in a line, pick fight/magic/Item from a menu and wait.
-Or, moving past interface/designs that only existed due to hardware limitations-
are met with fear, irrational rage, insults and a refusal to accept change or improvement.

Immune to logic, common sense, counter arguments or objective, even handed thought.
Final Fantasy VII fankids want Final Fantasy VII over and over with graphical improvements only. They are also arrogant enough to define the entire series by superficial means like "being turn-based".
Nothing will ever be good enough because they don't want it to be and don't care how ignorant and stupid they look.
by Lig Na Baste June 9, 2008
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Encyclopedia Dramatica

A failed attempt at a Wikipedia parody that is actually a cover for a non-stop bitching and whining fest, in which it's users insult things for simply being popular to give off the illusion of being iconoclastic or edgy.

For every entry that may actually be funny, there are at least five that are simply a twenty year old loser coming up with sentences to fit the word faggotry into while "sticking it" to some sub-culture of people no one in their right minds gives two shits about.

Tips for the budding ED writer:

Believe that the word "lulz" is some magical incantation that successfully shields you from potential scrutiny. Apparently when you do everything that your site condemns, you are no longer a neckbeard basement dweller, obsessed loser if you write for ED and use "I did it for teh lulz" as an opening disclaimer.

Each entry should read like the World's Angriest Mad Lib. Take X (the subject that will garner the most "look at me, I need attention because no one loves me" points) then start with a stupid origin ripped from the previous 500 entries. Swear a lot. Link to no less than 400 other entries, 200 of which should be their lame inside jokes/memes that are somehow less retarded than everyone else's. Annie may! Betty Sue! 100 years ago! *wipes tear* Pure comedy gold.

Basically just copy and past a previous entry, take out the subject key words, add a few "faggotry's" and cock/gay/nigger/Jew/Nazi/rape jokes to it and call it a day. That way, you can rest assured knowing you pissed off some random people for no real reason.

When people get upset, pretend that no one is supposed to take it seriously (at least, not more seriously than you do) and that you know what parody or satire looks like. Also stand by the false assumption that you are funny and that anyone who simply finds the complete reliance on the same five stale jokes lame doesn't have a sense of humor. Also "funny" means biting everyone else's writing style to fit in.

You can be offensive and funny. Comedians do it all the time. However, there is a reason most of the ED writers are on ED. They just aren't funny.
Encyclopedia Dramatica is a nerd-run hate site disguised as a satirical Wikipedia but anyone with a half a brain can see through that paper thin pretense.
by Lig Na Baste May 31, 2008
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Anti-SJW

That guy never shuts up about SJWS, and brings them up all the time. Any time someone or something shows even the slightest bit of left leanings (inclusivity, sensitivity, defiance of masculine cliches, awareness of issues that he feels are weak). Being an Anti-SJW, he never realizes that he too is rallying for social justice. His own. Anti-SJWs are social justice warriors that espouse the same justice.
by Lig Na Baste July 17, 2019
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Fanboy

An extreme fan or follower of a particular medium or concept, whether it be sports, television, film directors, video games (the most common usage), etc.

Known for a complete lack of objectivity in relation to their preferred focus. Usually argue with circular logic that they refuse to acknowledge. Arguments or debates with such are usually futile. Every flaw is spun into semi-virtues and everything else, blown to comedic, complimentary proportions.

Known for using the phrase
"Object of affection = Best Ever"
However, while people only really say that as hyperbole, fanboys truly believe it.

Troll the internet to spread the gospel.

Insult/chastise others for using public forums to express an objective opinion, no matter how constructive or, respectful it may be. (Go ahead and admit that it's a good game/movie/etc. This fact and anything else will be promptly ignored in favor of cherry picking the negative, and beating you over the head with it.

Tend to resort to petty annoyance replies when backed against the wall. Usually grammar attacks and non-replies.
"Final Fantasy VII is the best RPG ever!"
"Ocarina of Time is the best game ever!"
"Linux is the best OS ever!"
"Xbox is the best console ever!"
"Dragonball Z is the best show ever!"

The sad thing is, fanboys don't realize, that these companies that fuel their passion, don't really give a damn about us. To me, defending a multi-national corporation like their your own family, is ridiculous. These organizations don't come to your house and help you when you're sick, they don't help you move, or drive you to the airport. They don't support you in any way. It's a business, not a friendship. As soon as you can no longer buy their product, you disappear to them.
by Lig Na Baste June 30, 2008
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