3 definitions by Jonathan McConnell

(noun) A cheap whore of dalliance and delay.
Instead of paying his electricity bill, Jonathan pissed away the afternoon playing two games of ATTACK, taking a personality test on facebook, and writing a few inane definitions on urbandictionary.com What a procrastitute!
by Jonathan McConnell February 17, 2009
(noun) A veritable virtuoso of avoidance. A diabolical mastermind at delaying not just mere tedious tasks, but critical life advancing decisions.
Once a promising film student and writer, Jonathan lost his motivation, quit school and squandered years of his life working in bars and restaurants. When this failed to get him far enough away from his goal of one day making a feature film, the master 'procrastitician' took a job teaching english in Morocco where he has has been for the past five years. He is currently considering planning to plan to start writing his first script later this year.
by Jonathan McConnell February 17, 2009
(noun) An undergraduate student who has just been exposed to Marx, Chomsky, Foucault and all subsequent post-colonial culture theory and resolved to confront and expose injustice and exploitation wherever it can be found. From your sweatshop manufactured sneakers and unfair trade coffee, to the TV shows you enjoy that were produced by networks that are owned by companies that are owned by corporations that are owned by international corporations that make weapons that kill babies in far off places. Their pursuit of justice however does not extend to the makers of tobacco products or alcoholic beverages.
As Doug relished the second bite of his delicious chicken burger, the undergradical sitting next to him extinguished his Indian Spirit cigarette and tapped his dog-eared cover of 'Diet for a New America'. "I would never put that stuff into my body. You have no idea how many steroids and antibiotics they put into the animals. Did you know Kentucky Fried Chicken had to change its name to KFC because the meat product they were selling could not meet the legal definition of 'chicken'?"
by Jonathan McConnell February 17, 2009

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