Jamie Douglas's definitions
When your whole world caves in on top of you (metaphorically or physically), you can be described as being crushed.
You can be crushed by large weights, but the most painful type of 'crushing' for a man is when he is smitten with a young lady over a long period of time (a co-worker or flatmate for example), only to be rejected when he attempts to initate a relationship. Normally a man crushed in such a way will be inconsolable for a few weeks, and will probably never recover. The only way for a man to avoid being crushed in such a way is to avoid ever getting emotionally close to a woman, and as such lead a lonely but un-crushable existance.
Women, being the apostles of Satan, are not crushable in this way. But they are crushable physically.
You can be crushed by large weights, but the most painful type of 'crushing' for a man is when he is smitten with a young lady over a long period of time (a co-worker or flatmate for example), only to be rejected when he attempts to initate a relationship. Normally a man crushed in such a way will be inconsolable for a few weeks, and will probably never recover. The only way for a man to avoid being crushed in such a way is to avoid ever getting emotionally close to a woman, and as such lead a lonely but un-crushable existance.
Women, being the apostles of Satan, are not crushable in this way. But they are crushable physically.
by Jamie Douglas September 3, 2006
Get the crushedmug. Really really really sweaty. Imagine a chubby fellow dining out at his local pastry shop - he stands, salivating, over the counter wondering which fatty treat to shove down his gullet, and then indecision strikes and he sweats over what to order. That's how sweaty you are if you're sweating like a fat man in a cake shop.
Incidently, if you are a fat person and want a way to avoid such problems as choosing which cake, my advice is to simply buy everything. Problem solved
Incidently, if you are a fat person and want a way to avoid such problems as choosing which cake, my advice is to simply buy everything. Problem solved
Kirsty: 'How was your squash game?'
Jim: 'Great, but now I'm sweating like a fat man in a cake shop.'
Jim: 'Great, but now I'm sweating like a fat man in a cake shop.'
by Jamie Douglas August 26, 2006
Get the sweating like a fat man in a cake shopmug. n. Homosexual. In reference to ........... the fact the person in question is ......... bent, and in the case of men ........ take it up the ....... (can you guess what it is yet) ......... (have a go) .......... (that's right) ....... bum!
John: "Turns out Sam takes it up the back passage."
Wayne: "Yeah, I always thought he was a bendy bum."
Wayne: "Yeah, I always thought he was a bendy bum."
by Jamie Douglas September 11, 2006
Get the bendy bummug. A time of week, originating from mathematicians in the northern town of Sheffield, when all pens must be dropped, all PC's powered down and the weekend must kick in.
friday @ 5 must be accompanied by beer drinking, music playing, bar snack munching and general chat about anything but work.
Acceptable topics of conversation include movies, art, sport, music, politics, travel, family, science, literature, food & drink, etc..
friday @ 5 must be accompanied by beer drinking, music playing, bar snack munching and general chat about anything but work.
Acceptable topics of conversation include movies, art, sport, music, politics, travel, family, science, literature, food & drink, etc..
by Jamie Douglas February 24, 2007
Get the friday @ 5mug. The ultimate male culinary delight.
The man breakfast (TM) must contain all of the following.
Bacon
Sausage
Egg
Mushroom
Black Pudding
Hash Browns
Beans
Tomato
Toast/Fried Bread
Extra such as ketchup, brown sauce, salt and pepper are essential.
The man breakfast is the only way to defeat a hangover, which is God's way of telling you that you had a good night.
The man breakfast (TM) must contain all of the following.
Bacon
Sausage
Egg
Mushroom
Black Pudding
Hash Browns
Beans
Tomato
Toast/Fried Bread
Extra such as ketchup, brown sauce, salt and pepper are essential.
The man breakfast is the only way to defeat a hangover, which is God's way of telling you that you had a good night.
Hey! You left the mushrooms off this man breakfast!
Oi! There's chips on my man breakfast - take it away!
Oi! There's chips on my man breakfast - take it away!
by Jamie Douglas December 19, 2006
Get the man breakfastmug. Golfing term. When you've totally topped the ball, but it squirts along the ground and goes a bloody mile because of how hard you hit it, your ball is 'running like a Kenyan on speed'.
This derives from the fact that Kenya has a long history of some of the best long distance runners in the world, and the effect that the drug speed has on people.
This derives from the fact that Kenya has a long history of some of the best long distance runners in the world, and the effect that the drug speed has on people.
by Jamie Douglas September 6, 2006
Get the running like a Kenyan on speedmug. Scott: "Hey Phil, have you seen the new girl Tracy?"
Phil: "Yeah Scott, but I hear she's got real margarine legs!"
Phil: "Yeah Scott, but I hear she's got real margarine legs!"
by Jamie Douglas September 30, 2006
Get the margarine legsmug.