Canadian currency, as seen by foreigners, especially Americans.
"Dude, I was on vacation in Canada, and they have this money they call Loonies, but it looks like Monopoly money. I asked some Quebecois store owner for some gum and a Coke, and he charged me 157 Monopoloonies."
Slang for masturbation, so called due to the product's convenience and speed.
Melissa: Why would a guy want to jack off instead of having sex with his significant other?
Mike: It's not that guys would prefer to jack off. Think of it this way: Some times, you just don't have a lot of time, but ya got needs, right? You'd prefer to sit down to a nice full meal, but when you have 20 minutes to shower, eat, and get to work, you can throw back a Hot Pocket in 2 or 3 minutes. It's not the ideal meal, but it's the most convenient when you're too rushed or lazy for a full meal.