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7 definitions by Commentator X

 
1.
A person uses this phrase to describe their sluggish condition when they have not drunk their usual quota of coffee to get going in the morning.
"Dude, why are you so slow and stupid today?"

"The coffeemaker broke. I stopped by Starbucks on my way to work, but I'm still under my cup."
by Commentator X December 13, 2009
 
2.
The practice of, while intoxicated, friending people on facebook that you don't know, barely know, or who actively hate you. This usually leads to embarassment the following day when the friend request is rejected, goes unanswered, or results in a hostile message back but no friend confirmation.
"After I got home from the bar last night, I drunkfriended Kyle. I totally forgot about it until this morning when I got a message from him and all it said was 'LOL'."

"Marla, you really need to stop drunkfriending people. You're just embarassing yourself."
by Commentator X September 25, 2009
 
3.
The practice of pretending you are on a cell phone call in order to avoid an unpleasant or awkward encounter with a person who has ventured into your immediate area. Can also be used in the car when recognizing someone on the street or in another vehicle.
"Dude, I saw Cynthia at the mall last night. I tried to avoid her but she came up and asked why I never called her back."

"You ought to try fakephoning. I pull out my cell whenever I see someone I don't want to talk to."
by Commentator X September 25, 2009
 
4.
Continuing to drink at home after getting home from a bar. The opposite of frontloading, where you drink at home before you go out.
"Dude, you were really wasted last night at OJ's. You must have done some frontloading."

"Yeah, but when I got home I started backloading and it got worse. I woke up in the bathtub."
by Commentator X August 27, 2009
 
5.
A child that a gay person had with a member of the opposite sex before realizing that he or she was gay.
"Melanie took her daughter Blossom to the park this morning."

"Melanie and Candace adopted a child?"

"No, Blossom is a pre-gay bio-child from Melanie's marriage to Mark a few years ago."
by Commentator X April 27, 2010
 
6.
The conversation that happens at work or school the day after a particularly significant status message is posted—referring to the content and either remarking on its wittiness or asking for more details. Can lead to awkward situations if someone in the near vicinity of the facebook followup is not a friend of the person who made the post.
Kyle: Man I wish Marla hadn't refused my friend request. She and Tim were having a facebook followup at the water cooler this morning and I had no idea what they were talking about.

Walter: Sucks to be you, doesn't it?
by Commentator X August 14, 2011
 
7.
One who deletes their own obnoxious comments in a contentious Facebook thread to make another person who reacted to them look like a fool.
Chad: Myra has lost her mind. Did you see her talking to herself last night on Trip’s post about penguins’ rights?

Vic: Nah, I was there earlier. Martin said some bad stuff to her and they went back and forth a few times and then he deleted his own comments.

Chad: He does that all the time. He’s a thread manipulator.
by Commentator X May 11, 2013