Skip to main content

Col. Hans Landa's definitions

Twitter tag

see hashtag. A "#" symbol used on Twitter to denote its subject material.
Facebook post: "Tix to see Kanye for 40 bux #winning"
Comment: "Stop using Twitter tags on FB, you little fuck."
by Col. Hans Landa October 3, 2011
mugGet the Twitter tag mug.

bullshitspeak

a language spoken by businessmen and CEOs. Used to confuse the people they're about to steal mad cash from by replacing common concepts with words that sound nice.

Examples include, but are in no way limited to:
Price point = price
Strategically reduced = fired
Capital = ca$h money
Sold at profit = Ripped off
Presented a convincing argument = lied to/threatened
Net worth = Maximum ransom

Great time to buy = We're in the shitter
Great time to sell = I want more shares

Executive board meeting = Vacation in Cancun

Unanimous decision = only the CEO agreed
Profitable relocation = we're moving to China
Unforeseen expenses = another vacation in Cancun
Somewhat suggested = absolutely required
Socialist = anyone who disagreed
Acquire via purchase = Buy
It was in the contract = If you take this to court you won't win
Salesman: "The price point of this house is so high, if you purchase now we can heavily recommend the likely executive redecision committee to select the nearby land for habitat enrichment rather than strategic redevelopment -- that is, if you agree to a slightly more significant lease agreement."

Normal person: "Don't gimme that bullshitspeak. How much do I have to pay so you won't put up the high-rise?"
by Col. Hans Landa December 30, 2011
mugGet the bullshitspeak mug.

no status

n.; the state of someone who is not sweet; someone who does not possess bro status or G status.
Guy #1: "I'm gonna do homework instead of hitting up the party."
Guy #2: "Dude...no status."
by Col. Hans Landa September 28, 2011
mugGet the no status mug.

sweet as fuck

adj. incredibly sweet, awesome, cool, or cetch to the point where comparability to sexual intercourse is possible.

A Hoss is usually this.
That party was sweet as fuck.
by Col. Hans Landa August 3, 2011
mugGet the sweet as fuck mug.

OCMD

Ocean City, Maryland. As opposed to OCNJ, which is not nearly at suitable for alcoholism, promiscuity, or having a good time.
by Col. Hans Landa August 3, 2011
mugGet the OCMD mug.

Share this definition

Sign in to vote

We'll email you a link to sign in instantly.

Or

Check your email

We sent a link to

Open your email