2 definitions by Christopher Rone
Briscoes are a specific breed of human being. Originating in Scotland, Briscoes eventually migrated to the U.S. and found the Southeast coast of Florida to have sufficient exposure to sunlight and greenery. Avid fishermen, poker players, lacrosse athletes, gifted speakers, intelligent students, engineers, sushi chefs, piano players, digital artists, writers, watch connoisseurs, travelers, cigar smokers, whiskey drinkers, thespians, golfers, exquisite lovers, orders their Manhattan straight up and with a blue cheese olive, Briscoes have been known to mask their suave and multifaceted personalities with a façade to increase the surprise one receives when meeting a Briscoe. Briscoe's tend to be cute, and cuddly, but definitely not forces to be reckoned with. Their cool demeanor in times of stress communicate a quiet fury, and demonstrates their evolutionary prowess, their near genetic perfection. Brain normally beats brawn; however, Briscoes have evolved to develop both in large quantities. Briscoes are bastions of character and values that the population ought to admire, revere, and emulate. Men, take note. Ladies, take cover. Briscoes are spreading and growing in numbers. Be prepared when you meet a Briscoe.
"There can only be one true Briscoe family"
"Briscoe taught me how to spearfish!"
"You wouldn't know it, but Briscoe loves Billy Joel"
"Briscoe taught me how to spearfish!"
"You wouldn't know it, but Briscoe loves Billy Joel"
by Christopher Rone December 10, 2016
When God was molding another Fred Armisan, he sneezed and spilled Chilean Ethnicity on top of them and just went with it. Typically the silent types, Ulloas range from stalker-scavengers (Maximus silencitus) to spastic prey (Maximus beltrasm). The silent Ulloas tend to sit back during conflicts or social gatherings of other species, then steals small bits of attention at a time. They can survive on minimal amounts of attention; however, they thrive on puns. The prey-type Ulloas have darkened skin to find food at night safely and enlarged noses for a heightened sense of smell, as well as a way of communicating and finding mates. Maximus silencitus generally stay so far away from other organisms that they can influence the cells in their bodies to bud and asexually form more Maximi.
"Oh honey, look at the Ulloas! They're so cute."
"Hey Ulloa, I forgot you were there"
"Ulloa watch out you almost hit me with your nose!"
"Hey Ulloa, I forgot you were there"
"Ulloa watch out you almost hit me with your nose!"
by Christopher Rone December 12, 2016