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Charitable Disguise's definitions

Scentophile

A rare psychiatric disorder wherein the intentional, premeditated act of inhaling the scent of an individual for purposes of olfactory gratification, induces an unwelcoming, untamable, primordial erection, so intense that blood flow to the hippocampus (memory recall) is temporarily depleted, thus resulting in the onset of incoherent verbal communications and an overall affect of non-accountable bafoonery, stemming from a neuropathic fugue.

In the early 1990's, and during the era of the band Vibe 45, Dr. Chris Culvitude of Copenhagen began his studies on the impacts of alternative music on human behavior, with a specific focus on the song "Smells Like Teen Spirit," by Nirvana. Curious patterns emerged from the data as Culvitude plotted the manifestation of exacerbated mannerisms elicited by politicians and statesmen, with their constituents during media events. Culvitude initially formed a narrow perspective, and the commonly known phrase "Boner Cloaking", to explain how, in public gatherings, politicians would smell the hair from the opposite sex, conjure up an erection (boner), then quickly immerse/hide in the crowd (cloaking), so as to not reveal their affliction. Culvitude and his partner, Dr. Kevin Michael Damone from Korkyville, would later present the full extent of their research on years of Boner Cloaking observations and what is now known as "Scentophilia", publishing it in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders under code JOeB-1Dn.
{Two friends watching TV} "Dude, why is that senator smelling that little girls hair for like ten minutes straight?" {Friend Replies} Didn't you know that the senator is 'Scentophile'? Its a classic DSM-MD case of JOeB-Dn.!"
by Charitable Disguise May 16, 2020
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Cave Bathing

An experiential rite of passage for graduate students wherein the immersion into ancient, thermal, translucent seminal fluid filled Hungarian caverns transforms dissonant, quasi-intellectual brain cells into a hyper-aligned neural configuration, inducing a genius level information processing, multi-dimensional innovation & superior emotional agility.

{Ca 2005 - Budapest Hungary: Two ambitious MBA students, Jason Von Goggle & D Dog, guided by their professorial mentor, Dr. Daniel Thongspeedo enter a musty portal accompanied by European post cold war era techno music. As the moist, loin infused vaporlettes enveloped the 3 men, a wafting sense of purpose revealed itself as a voice, eminating from the waters edge resemblant of an Ancient Ottoman Angel, they heard the words (Hungarian accent), "Get into the cave bath...& explore my caverns." Perplexed, yet eager with confused anticipation, the 3 swam through the hybrid, geo-architectural labyrinth on a quest for wisdom, enlightenment & a surprise, grotesque coital engagement between consenting adults donning the minimum garments required, enough so to give a child mental scars but not risque enough to get arrested. Von Goggle & D Dog would soon emerge, cleansed, subtly violated & reinvigorated with the motivation of an ancient Greco Roman scholar, suited for battle, ontological debate & prepared to expose themselves, with confidence in a more revealing, modernized bathing outfit, like that of their mentor, Dr. Daniel Thongspeedo.
1. "Jason, what is that shimmering oily film on top of the water? Is that supposed to be part of the 'Cave Bathing' experience?" Yes, D Dog, now quit looking at that hairy couple in a primordial carnal exchange, and dunk your sack in the Cave Bath.

2. {Professor Thongspeedo explains to Jason and D Dog} "Gentlemen, follow me down the corridor and immerse yourselves in the bountiful tonic that once permeated the flesh from the likes of the ancient Romans. Now, forget that you just saw a man clipping his toenails near the edge of the reservoir into the bath, and join me in the celebration of your transformation to noble scholars, courtesy of the 'Cave Bathing' experience."
by Charitable Disguise January 25, 2020
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Sanfu

1. A multi-purpose, ultra-compact motorized utility vehicle, engineered for service functions and customer/member transportation on and around resort, country club and golf course properties.

2. A late 1980's hyper-modified, ungoverned, all terrain archetype vessel of symbolic freedom, hijinks and calamitous mischief, principally maintained, operated, carefully supervised and controlled by outside service staff members at Arrowhead Country Club.

Infamous for the following celebrated capers and stunts:
"Legend of the Rizer" - the tribal tale of the reticent and ambitious bagboy who once jumped the Sanfu 50+ feet off a random, unevenly tamped pile of construction refuse pitched at ~30 degree incline to the cheers, jeers and warnings of hopeful/concerned bagboy onlookers.

"The Hunger Run" - adapted for a swift and spontaneous remediation of early morning hunger pains, the Sanfu accelerator governance restrictor was intentionally removed to ensure optimal travel time to and from ABCO to acquire pop tarts and cinnamon toast.

"Orchard Wars" - A labyrinth where intrigue, uncertainty, aboriginal migrants, nourishment and adolescent debauchery culminate in the fulfilling experience of using the Sanfu as an agile motorized lance, navigating and enabling ripened/unripened citrus projectiles to be launched efficiently and with high accuracy at Dave, Rob, Matt, Nick, Mike, Korky, Giles, Kevin, Jim, Laramie, Derek, BK, Berardi, Scooter, and the never to be forgotten Nate.
"Dude, Rizer opened up the throttle on the Sanfu, drove around the curb and launched the Sanfu 50 feet over that ridge!"

"Hey Kevin, let's do rock, paper, scissors to see who will take the Sanfu to ABCO to get breakfast"

"Did you see how Matt leaned out of the side of the Sanfu and hurled a grapefruit with pinpoint accuracy into Dave's back, causing him to launch out of the cart, into a pile of dirt?"
by Charitable Disguise November 24, 2019
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Sanfu

1. A multi-purpose, ultra-compact motorized utility vehicle, engineered for service functions and customer/member transportation on and around resort, country club and golf course properties.

2. A late 1980's hyper-modified, ungoverned, all terrain archetype vessel of symbolic freedom, hijinks and calamitous mischief, principally maintained, operated, carefully supervised and controlled by outside service staff members at Arrowhead Country Club.

Infamous for the following celebrated capers and stunts:
"Legend of the Rizer" - the tribal tale of the reticent and ambitious bagboy who once jumped the Sanfu 50+ feet off a random, unevenly tamped pile of construction refuse pitched at ~30 degree incline to the cheers, jeers and warnings of hopeful/concerned bagboy onlookers.

"The Hunger Run" - adapted for a swift and spontaneous remediation of early morning hunger pains, the Sanfu accelerator governance restrictor was intentionally removed to ensure optimal travel time to and from ABCO to acquire pop tarts and cinnamon toast.

"Orchard Wars" - A labyrinth where intrigue, uncertainty, aboriginal migrants, nourishment and adolescent debauchery culminate in the fulfilling experience of using the Sanfu as an agile motorized lance, navigating and enabling ripened/unripened citrus projectiles to be launched efficiently and with high accuracy at Dave, Rob, Matt, Nick, Mike, Korky, Giles, Kevin, Jim, Laramie, Derek, BK, Berardi, Scooter, and the never to be forgotten Nate.
"Dude, Rizer opened up the throttle on the Sanfu, drove around the curb and launched the Sanfu 50 feet over that ridge!"

"Hey Kevin, let's do rock, paper, scissors to see who will take the Sanfu to ABCO to get breakfast"

"Did you see how Matt leaned out of the side of the Sanfu and hurled a grapefruit with pinpoint accuracy into Dave's back, causing him to launch out of the cart, into a pile of dirt?"
by Charitable Disguise November 24, 2019
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Ethnicitized

Derived from the words Ethnicity + Hypnotized, Ethnicitized is the intentional act of modifying, transforming & dispositioning ones identity from self, into a psychomorphic, hyperdouched state of being wherein the individual choreographs & elicits social/behavioral patterns, designed to personify the mannerisms, dialect & slang of a target ethic group, to gain acceptance, favor, goods, services &/or alliance oriented popularity for reasons of political advancement.

Over time, the repetitious execution of such tactics results in an amnesiac cerebal impressioning of temporal permanence, accompanied by a spontaneous, involuntary, visceral, schizophrenic, socially triggered personality change, unbeknownst to the individual, but completely obvious to others.

Dr. Chris Culvitude of Copenhagen returned to the Coyote Lakes psychiatric hospital to inform Dr. Kevin Michael Damone and Pro-Fessor Campbell about his findings on the Baptits Foundation & the unethical microcosm of Flakycock councilmen who posed as religious figureheads, fronting theological prowess so as to steal pensions from Ernie, Menden & 300+ victims. Culvitude viewed 20yrs of data, overlaying R score models on data sets, receiving a confidence trigger during a presidential candidate interview in 2020, when the incumbent (Anglo Saxon) performed his unique, Corn Pop gangsta style talk with well educated/astute African American interviewers. Thus, the condition - 'Ethnicitized' was born. DSM-5 code: j0E-bIdN-cM0n:mAn
{Friends discussing politics} "Dude, I am watching an interview with this 77 year old white guy running for president, and he keeps using this weird slang, and this odd tone of voice, as if he is trying to sound like he is from some tribe. {Friend Responds} "Yeah, that guy is totally 'Ethnicitized', trying to pretend that he is African American to an African American audience. Its quite comical. Oh, also, did you know that he knuckle-dunked his fingers into an intern's vagina too, because, well, "he thought she liked him."
by Charitable Disguise May 24, 2020
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Black Sock

Originally observed during an urgent, unplanned wardrobe transition from business attire to comfortable clothes at the onset of band practice, the term, 'Black Sock', evolved symbolically from a stereotypical garment donning of conformity (working for 'the man') to a statement of transformation, rebellion, commitment, fun, freedom and an unrelenting promulgation of ingenious collaboration with band mates. Sometimes chanted in the form of familiar choral revelries so as to induce and incite a frolic oriented 'BLACK SOCK' dance as an acknowledgement of symbiotic creativity among band mates.
Scenario Form and Description
Band member shows up to practice in business attire, quickly changes into shorts and a shirt, realizes he does not have extra socks, embarrassingly saunters into the arena with his guitar + comfortable clothes wearing his black business socks. Band mates, quick to observe and curtail said identity kerfuffle caused by the leftover business garments, initiate a chant:
"D Dog, Yes!!!

BLACK SOCK left,

BLACK SOCK right,

BLACK SOCK mutha fu**** gonna dance all night"
At the induced choral behest of his band mates, D Dog drops his instrument and proceeds to entertain his comrades with an accompanying Court Jester tempo oriented kick swap dance as a method of activating band member creativity.
by Charitable Disguise November 9, 2019
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Notindapicha

A hastily serious command spoken with a firm and flippant intent to shenanigan laden onlookers attempting to disrupt, ruin or bomb the process of taking a photo. 'Notindapicha', \naught-inda-peach-uh\ was originally derived from the interpretation of an Asian accentuated fusion of the English words, "Not in the picture", in an effort to clarify the purpose and role of an outside service golf attendant who was asked to "Take a Picture"of the Nippon Open tournament golfers. Often articulated in combination with the word 'Taykapicha' (Take a picture).
Scenario and Form:
1. Jaime, an outside services golf attendant, is asked by the Nippon Open coordinator to 'Take a picture' of the organized assembly of tournament golfers. Jaime, in a playful retort, assumes a center facing pose, smiling among the gallery as if to be included in the photograph. Harried, beguiled and curiously assertive with a tinge of expressed humor, the Nippon Open coordinator exclaims, "Notindapicha....................Taykapicha!!!"
by Charitable Disguise November 21, 2019
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