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Charitable Disguise's definitions

Night

A covert, stealthily disguised term of endearment used to fervently intimate the attractiveness of a female, often emphasized with reckless, pre-pubescent enthusiasm. In cases of extreme glamour and beauty, occasionally pronounced with a heightened focus on sustaining vocal droning and amplitude on the letter "I".
She's a "Night!"
Night!
OMG dude, she is a frickin Niiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight!
by Charitable Disguise October 12, 2019
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Dermal Incineration Event

Irreparable damage to human skin/cellular DNA caused during the era of radical climate change beginning in 1991.

{A progressive term used to characterize the harmful, mutative and disabling effects of global warming on human tissue, wherein hyper-radioactive, electro magnetic waves bombard, eviscerate, and, over extended periods of time, 'incinerate' layers of 'dermis' (skin). The presence of pathology is detectable when cellular membranes become necrotically cauterized, inducing an incurable, desmoplastic form of melanoma. The evidentiary revelation of the Dermal Incineration Event, or D.I.E., (beginning in 1991) was introduced by 'Al Gore Research Institute' scientists; Dr. Johnson Cooks, Professor Patty Meltingood and Dr. Kevin Michael Damone of Ridgemont.}
1. Many of our neighbors were recently diagnosed with skin cancer as a consequence of the "Dermal Incineration Event."

2. Dr. Kevin Michael Damone gave two Earth Wind and Fire tickets to Charles Jefferson and his brother, then, 9 years later, published his introspective, proprietary, sealed thesis regarding the effects of the "Dermal Incineration Event (D.I.E.)" on the human condition after comparing conclusive data from three prominent subjects, Stacey, Linda and Mark Ratnor, while listening to side 1 of Led Zeppelin IV.
by Charitable Disguise December 21, 2019
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Seismic Aqueous Waveform

An abnormally massive wave.
{On November 26, 2019 off the coast of Oregon (United States), 11 different satellite instruments designed to measure wave height, wave length and the direction of ocean swell systems, relayed real time and pattern delayed SAR and altimeter data providing conclusive evidence of the first ever observation of a Seismic Aqueous Waveform (S.A.W.). In the early 1800's, Sir James Clark Ross and British Naval Officer Count Fluervo of Korkyville presented an original postulate for Seismic Aqueous Waveforms (S.A.W.) suggesting that chaotic and abnormal deep sea land masses (what we now refer to as tectonic plates) were capable of colliding and dispersing an exponential quantity of kinetic energy resulting in oceanic swells up to 1950 feet high (conditions unknown at the time proximate to the mathematical equivalent/scale estimated during the Paleozoic Pangea fracturing events, circa 350 million years BC). The magnitude, span, volume and force of a S.A.W. is much greater than a Tsunami, hence a S.A.W. is also commonly referred to as a 'Supernami.'}
1. In 2019, a Seismic Aqueous Waveform was detected about 100 miles west of the California/Oregon coastline.

2. {Water cooler discussion begins} "Did you see the size of that Tsunami that nearly hit the California beaches this week?" {Conversational partner replies} "My friend, that was not a Tsunami, it was a S.A.W,, also known as a Supernami."

3. Sir James Clark Ross and Count Fleurvo of Korkyville were finally recognized for their research and position on Seismic Aqueous Waveforms (S.A.W.).
by Charitable Disguise December 19, 2019
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Squid In A Ditch

A profound and controversial characterization of the female genitalia, where "Ditch" represents the angular, contoured bordering meat of the labia, and "Squid" depicts the amorphous, unidentifiable, moistened nonsense in between. Sometimes used as the final closing/mic drop term in adolescent "funny names for genitalia" competitions.
Dude, she pulled up her skirt and it totally looked like a frickin "Squid in a Ditch!"
by Charitable Disguise October 12, 2019
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Cave Bathing

An experiential rite of passage for graduate students wherein the immersion into ancient, thermal, translucent seminal fluid filled Hungarian caverns transforms dissonant, quasi-intellectual brain cells into a hyper-aligned neural configuration, inducing a genius level information processing, multi-dimensional innovation & superior emotional agility.

{Ca 2005 - Budapest Hungary: Two ambitious MBA students, Jason Von Goggle & D Dog, guided by their professorial mentor, Dr. Daniel Thongspeedo enter a musty portal accompanied by European post cold war era techno music. As the moist, loin infused vaporlettes enveloped the 3 men, a wafting sense of purpose revealed itself as a voice, eminating from the waters edge resemblant of an Ancient Ottoman Angel, they heard the words (Hungarian accent), "Get into the cave bath...& explore my caverns." Perplexed, yet eager with confused anticipation, the 3 swam through the hybrid, geo-architectural labyrinth on a quest for wisdom, enlightenment & a surprise, grotesque coital engagement between consenting adults donning the minimum garments required, enough so to give a child mental scars but not risque enough to get arrested. Von Goggle & D Dog would soon emerge, cleansed, subtly violated & reinvigorated with the motivation of an ancient Greco Roman scholar, suited for battle, ontological debate & prepared to expose themselves, with confidence in a more revealing, modernized bathing outfit, like that of their mentor, Dr. Daniel Thongspeedo.
1. "Jason, what is that shimmering oily film on top of the water? Is that supposed to be part of the 'Cave Bathing' experience?" Yes, D Dog, now quit looking at that hairy couple in a primordial carnal exchange, and dunk your sack in the Cave Bath.

2. {Professor Thongspeedo explains to Jason and D Dog} "Gentlemen, follow me down the corridor and immerse yourselves in the bountiful tonic that once permeated the flesh from the likes of the ancient Romans. Now, forget that you just saw a man clipping his toenails near the edge of the reservoir into the bath, and join me in the celebration of your transformation to noble scholars, courtesy of the 'Cave Bathing' experience."
by Charitable Disguise January 25, 2020
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Percussive Universal Soundwave

A repetitious, unexplainable high frequency radio wave transmission received by earth from an unknown source/location within and/or outside our galaxy.

{From 1962 through 2016, 11 Interstellar Radio Mesessage projects (IRMPs) transmitted 50+ messages out across the universe from earth. In 1996, a unique happenstance occured when the convergence of sound wave files during a studio recording session for the band Vibe 45, revealed an anomaly in the form of a high frequency sound wave blip registering at an astonishing 180k Hz (detectable only by the Alosa Saspidissima aka the American Shad) through a customized Crappatoe transducer equipped with a panoramic floppycack jacker. The evidence file was shared with Dr. Chris Culvitude of Copenhagen for a forensic analysis. Dr. Culvitude disaggregated the wave structure using a four dimensional, parabolic floppycack translator and the results were astonishing. The blip unveiled irrefutable evidence of a Percussive Universal Soundwave, or P.U.S., which surreptitiously, included a complex linguistic code, patterned to form the following words: "We Want The Funk", an extraterrestrial response conveying Alien displeasure related to the 50+ boring messages sent, and a plea to the band members of Vibe 45 to send them some ball knocking, Parliament style grooves in the next transmission. Dr. Culvitude mysteriously disappeared in 2001 and his sound popping theory showcasing P.U.S. was never formally published.
1. Scientists recently detected a Percussive Universal Soundwave from an unknown source in the universe.

2. {Dr. Culvitude shows his floppycack package to D Dog of Vibe 45 and explains} "D Dog, you are not going to believe this. The blip is a Percussive Universal Soundwave, and, when I decrypted the pattern into language, you can actually hear alien voices chanting "We Want the Funk!!"
by Charitable Disguise January 8, 2020
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Notindapicha

A hastily serious command spoken with a firm and flippant intent to shenanigan laden onlookers attempting to disrupt, ruin or bomb the process of taking a photo. 'Notindapicha', \naught-inda-peach-uh\ was originally derived from the interpretation of an Asian accentuated fusion of the English words, "Not in the picture", in an effort to clarify the purpose and role of an outside service golf attendant who was asked to "Take a Picture"of the Nippon Open tournament golfers. Often articulated in combination with the word 'Taykapicha' (Take a picture).
Scenario and Form:
1. Jaime, an outside services golf attendant, is asked by the Nippon Open coordinator to 'Take a picture' of the organized assembly of tournament golfers. Jaime, in a playful retort, assumes a center facing pose, smiling among the gallery as if to be included in the photograph. Harried, beguiled and curiously assertive with a tinge of expressed humor, the Nippon Open coordinator exclaims, "Notindapicha....................Taykapicha!!!"
by Charitable Disguise November 21, 2019
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