Carl J. Maltese's definitions
1) A girl (or guy) who thinks they are a model, but in reality they are not. Usually they are just full-of-themselves, among other things!
2) A girl (or guy) who thinks they are a model, but really couldn't and shouldn't! They should take that money they were saving for Barbizon and go buy a mirror!
3) Any girl (or guy) who isn't pretty...they just look that way!!
2) A girl (or guy) who thinks they are a model, but really couldn't and shouldn't! They should take that money they were saving for Barbizon and go buy a mirror!
3) Any girl (or guy) who isn't pretty...they just look that way!!
"There was always that one girl we knew back in high school. The spoiled only-child type who practically smothered herself in makeup and nail polish and was too busy to so much as give you the time of day. She thought she was going to be a model, but in reality she was just another barbizombie, trapped in the endless night-of-the-living-depressed."
by Carl J. Maltese May 5, 2007
Get the barbizombiemug. Suposed homosexual porn movie about the life of Jesus Christ compared with a nameless contemporary man and their shared sexual tastes. Hotly sought-out and marked for destruction by the Religious Right, in reality there is NO SUCH MOVIE!!!
Rumours of such a movie have been circulating since the early 1970's. Said rumours were probably started amongst the Gay community for sole purpose of annoying the Moraly Indignant, and there was even a false review of it in a book about the "golden turkeys," aka the worst movies ever made. This, of course, only served to strengthing the Religious Right's resolve to find-and-burn!! It's review in said book of "golden turkeys" was actually part of a reader contest to find the one fake movie amongst the real "stinkers."
Despite endless (and fruitless) searches --and the truth being held in their collective faces-- certain members of the Religious Right still continue their sacred mission to find-and-destroy this non-existant movie!
Rumours of such a movie have been circulating since the early 1970's. Said rumours were probably started amongst the Gay community for sole purpose of annoying the Moraly Indignant, and there was even a false review of it in a book about the "golden turkeys," aka the worst movies ever made. This, of course, only served to strengthing the Religious Right's resolve to find-and-burn!! It's review in said book of "golden turkeys" was actually part of a reader contest to find the one fake movie amongst the real "stinkers."
Despite endless (and fruitless) searches --and the truth being held in their collective faces-- certain members of the Religious Right still continue their sacred mission to find-and-destroy this non-existant movie!
Bill: "Hey, man. You here about that gay-porn movie called "Him?" Some pretty freaky sheet happens in it!"
Tom: "Calm yourself down before you ruin your shorts. There is no such movie. It's all just a rumour going 'round."
Bill: "Really? Then what the hell was that video I was watching last night!?"
Tom: "You STILL have home video of my 16th birthday party!?"
Tom: "Calm yourself down before you ruin your shorts. There is no such movie. It's all just a rumour going 'round."
Bill: "Really? Then what the hell was that video I was watching last night!?"
Tom: "You STILL have home video of my 16th birthday party!?"
by Carl J. Maltese May 12, 2007
Get the Himmug. A nice job, if you can get it.
by Carl J. Maltese April 21, 2007
Get the blow jobmug. "Sheeeeeet! It sure is cumin' down out there! Raining like a double-cunted cow pissing on a flat rock!"
by Carl J. Maltese April 28, 2007
Get the raining like a double-cunted cow pissing on a flat rockmug. Toasterphobia is the dreaded fear of sticking a fork into a toaster even after it's been unplugged....because sometimes the toaster remembers!
Mike: "Because of my severe toasterphobia, I have continuous nightmares about being chased by a giant toaster and a giant fork wearing running shoes!"
Art: "Dude, you're f**king wacked!!"
Art: "Dude, you're f**king wacked!!"
by Carl J. Maltese April 21, 2007
Get the toasterphobiamug. "The damn tea dumping psychos! Five-thousand-pounds worth of tea thrown right off the bloody ships! The bloody crates are all completley soaked through, making the tea totally unfit for drinking. Even for Americans."
by Carl J. Maltese April 1, 2007
Get the tea dumping psychosmug. "You know that new kid around the corner? The one with the hippie parents? He's a real cigarette smoking Scurv!"
by Carl J. Maltese April 15, 2007
Get the Scurvmug.